It was the finest tank trick I ever saw, and it was greeted with laughter and cheers. The King, however, and other spectators were rather worried about the lads inside. They must have taken a mighty toss. No sound came from the inside of the tank, and for a moment some of us had a vision of a number of plucky fellows laid out unconscious within those steel walls. The door opened and we could see their feet standing straight, which was a relief. “Let them all come out,” said the King, laughing heartily. And out they all tumbled, a row of young fellows as merry and bright as air pilots after a good landing. THE FEMALE STANDARD OF SIZE Lady (entering bank, very businesslike)—“I wish to get a Liberty Loan bond for my husband.” Clerk—“What size, please?” Lady—“Why, I don’t believe I know, exactly, but he wears a fifteen shirt.” STORY OF OUR FIRST SHOT “I PICKED that shell right up as it came out of the gun—I saw it go through the air in its flight, and I saw it strike a foot in front of that periscope!” That is the way Lieut. Bruce R. Ware, Jr., U. S. N., who commanded the gun crew of the steamship _Mongolia_, told of the first American shot fired in the war at a German submarine. He related the story at a testimonial dinner given to him and to Capt. Emery Rice, of the _Mongolia_, upon the arrival of the steamship at New York. The dinner was attended by many persons prominent in business, steamship, and naval circles, some having traveled hundreds of miles to be present. As reported by the New York _Times_, Lieutenant Ware told the story as follows: At 5:21 the chief officer walked out on the port bridge. The captain and myself were on our heels looking out through the port. I saw the chief officer turn around, and you could have seen the whole ocean written in his face, and his mouth that wide (indicating), and he could not get it out. He finally said: “My God, look at that submarine!” The captain gripped my arm and said: “What is that?” I said: “It is a submarine, and he has got up.” I followed the captain out on the bridge and I looked at my gun crews. They were all agape. The lookout was all agape. I threw in my starboard control and I said: “Captain, zigzag.” I did not tell him which way to go. We had that all doped out. The captain starboarded his helm and the ship turned to port and we charged him (the _U_-boat) and made him go under. I went up on top of the chart house with my phones on, and I had a long, powerful glass, ten power. Right underneath it I always lashed my transmitter, so that where I was my transmitter went, and I didn’t have to worry or hunt for it. It was always plugged in, and I said: “No. 3 gun, after gun, train on the starboard quarter, and when you see a submarine and periscope or conning tower, report.”