French fiction -- 20th century -- Translations into English
Under her fingers, Annette felt the rough, bushy hair, the swelling of
the forehead and the beating temples. This imperious man was placing
himself under her protection. She leaned towards him and he raised his
face. It was their first kiss.
His arms encircled Annette, who had dropped on her knees beside him and
no longer resisted, as if she had no breath left, and Philippe, violent
as he was, had no thought of taking advantage of his victory. "I want
everything," he said, "all of you, mistress, friend, companion--my woman
altogether."
Annette extricated herself. Noémi's image had risen before her. A
moment before it had been she who had driven her from her consciousness.
But that Philippe should do the same thing wounded her in a way, wounded
her in that instinctive freemasonry of women who, even as enemies, find
themselves leagued against the aggressiveness of man--one body in
common.
"You cannot," said Annette. "You belong to another."
He shrugged his shoulders. "There's nothing of me that she possesses."
"She has your name and your faith."
"What does the name matter? You have the rest."
"I don't care about the name, but I must have your faith. I give it and
I ask for it."
"I am ready to give it to you."
But Annette, who had asked for it, felt a certain revolt when it was
offered to her. "No! no! Do you mean to take it away from her who has
shared your life for years and give it to me whom you have only seen
three times?"
"It has not required three times for me to see you."
"You don't know me."
"I do know you. I have learned to see into life quickly. Life goes by
and no moment ever appears twice. You must make up your mind on the spot
or you can never make it up. You are passing, Rivière, and if I do not
take you I lose you. I take you."
"You may be making a mistake."
"Perhaps. I know that when one makes a decision one often makes a
mistake. But in not deciding one always makes a mistake. I should never
forgive myself the error of having seen you without determining to
possess you."
"What do you know about me?"
"More than you think. I know that you have been rich and that you are
poor, that you had a youth filled with all the pleasures of wealth and
that you were ruined and cast out of your world, that you have struggled
and not weakened. I know what your struggle has been, for I underwent it
myself, every day, for thirty years of my life, a hand-to-hand struggle,
and twenty times I was on the point of giving in. You have held out. As
for me, I was used to it. I have known abject poverty from the cradle.
You had a thin skin, and you were pampered and made much of. You did not
yield. You have never accepted any shameful compromise. You never tried
to escape the struggle by any feminine means, seduction or the honest
expedient of a marriage for money."
"Do you imagine it has been offered to me so many times?"
"That is because they knew very well, even the meanest of them, that you
are not a person to be bought by contract."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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