Americans -- Italy -- Fiction; Married women -- Fiction; Sicily (Italy) -- Fiction; Sun-baths -- Fiction
She slid off all her clothes and lay naked in the sun, and as she lay
she looked up through her fingers at the central sun, his blue pulsing
roundness, whose outer edges streamed brilliance. Pulsing with
marvellous blue, and olive, and streaming white fire from his edges, the
sun! He faced down to her with his look of blue fire, and enveloped her
breasts and her face, her throat, her tired belly, her knees, her thighs
and her feet.
She lay with shut eyes, the colour of rosy flame through her lids. It
was too much. She reached and put leaves over her eyes. Then she lay
again, like a long white gourd in the sun, that must ripen to gold.
She could feel the sun penetrating even into her bones; nay, further,
even into her emotions and her thoughts. The dark tensions of her
emotion began to give way, the cold dark clots of her thoughts began to
dissolve. She was beginning to feel warm right through. Turning over,
she let her shoulders dissolve in the sun, her loins, the backs of her
thighs, even her heels. And she lay half stunned with wonder at the
thing that was happening to her. Her weary, chilled heart was melting,
and in melting, evaporating.
When she was dressed again she lay once more and looked up at the
cypress tree, whose crest, a flexible filament, fell this way and that
in the breeze. Meanwhile, she was conscious of the great sun roaming in
heaven.
So, dazed, she went home, only half-seeing, sun-blinded and sun-dazed.
And her blindness was like a richness to her, and her dim, warm, heavy
half-consciousness was like wealth.
"Mummy! Mummy!" her child came running towards her, calling in that
peculiar bird-like little anguish of want, always wanting her. She was
surprised that her drowsed heart for once felt none of the anxious
love-anguish in return. She caught the child up in her arms, but she
thought: He should not be such a lump! If he were in the sun, he would
spring up.
She resented, rather, his little hands clutching at her, especially her
neck. She pulled her throat away. She did not want to be touched. She
put the child gently down.
"Run!" she said. "Run in the sun!"
And there and then she took off his clothes and set him naked on the
warm terrace.
"Play in the sun!" she said.
He was frightened and wanted to cry. But she, in the warm indolence of
her body, and the complete indifference of her heart, rolled him an
orange across the red tiles, and with his soft, unformed little body he
toddled after it. Then immediately he had it, he dropped it because it
felt strange against his flesh. And he looked back at her, querulous,
wrinkling his face to cry, frightened because he was stark.
"Bring me the orange," she said, amazed at her own deep indifference to
his trepidation. "Bring Mummy the orange.
"He shall not grow up like his father," she said to herself. "Like a
worm that the sun has never seen."
II
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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