Sunday at Home (From "Twice Told Tales")Hawthorne, Nathaniel
Religion
Sunday at Home (From "Twice Told Tales")
Hawthorne, Nathaniel
Historical fiction, American; New England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Short stories
Here comes the clergyman, slow and solemn, in severe simplicity,
needing no black silk gown to denote his office. His aspect claims
my reverence, but cannot win my love. Were I to picture Saint Peter,
keeping fast the gate of heaven, and frowning, more stern than pitiful,
on the wretched applicants, that face should be my study. By middle age,
or sooner, the creed has generally wrought upon the heart, or been
a-tempered by it. As the minister passes into the church, the bell holds
its iron tongue, and all the low murmur of the congregation dies away.
The gray sexton looks up and down the street, and then at my
window-curtain, where, through the small peephole, I half fancy that he
has caught my eye. Now, every loiterer has gone in, and the street
lies asleep in the quiet sun, while a feeling of loneliness comes over
me, and brings also an uneasy sense of neglected privileges and duties.
O, I ought to have gone to church! The hustle of the rising
congregation reaches my ears. They are standing up to pray. Could I
bring my heart into unison with those who are praying in yonder church,
and lift it heavenward, with a fervor of supplication, but no distinct
request, would not that be the safest kind of prayer? "Lord, look down
upon me in mercy!" With that sentiment gushing from my soul, might I
not leave all the rest to Him?
Hark! the hymn. This, at least, is a portion of the service which I
can enjoy better than if I sat within the walls, where the full choir
and the massive melody of the organ, would fall with a weight upon me.
At this distance, it thrills through my frame, and plays upon my
heartstrings, with a pleasure both of the sense and spirit. Heaven be
praised, I know nothing of music, as a science; and the most elaborate
harmonies, if they please me, please as simply as a nurse's lullaby.
The strain has ceased, but prolongs itself in my mind, with fanciful
echoes, till I start from my revery, and find that the sermon has
commenced. It is my misfortune seldom to fructify, in a regular way, by
any but printed sermons. The first strong idea, which the preacher
utters, gives birth to a train of thought, and leads me onward, step by
step, quite out of hearing of the good man's voice, unless he be indeed
a son of thunder. At my open window, catching now and then a sentence
of the "parson's saw," I am as well situated as at the foot of the
pulpit stairs. The broken and scattered fragments of this one discourse
will be the texts of many sermons, preached by those colleague
pastors,--colleagues, but often disputants,--my Mind and Heart. The
former pretends to be a scholar, and perplexes me with doctrinal
points; the latter takes me on the score of feeling; and both, like
several other preachers, spend their strength to very little purpose.
I, their sole auditor, cannot always understand them.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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