British -- France -- Fiction; Diary fiction; Epistolary fiction; Household employees -- Fiction; Love stories; Young women -- Fiction
"Susan!" I cried. "Gibson! Listen! Let Susan come to me for one
minute. Something tremendous has happened to-night, and I am bound to
let her know it. Susan, come here. When you have heard it, you shall go
with Gibson or come home with me, just as you think best."
Before he could restrain her, she slipped from his grasp and ran to my
side. He followed. I threw my arm round her waist.
"If you please, Ma’am," said Gibson tensely, standing almost as close to
me as Susan, "there’s going to be no more secrets. What’s right to be
said at all can be said out loud."
I considered. Then I spoke out clearly and loudly.
"Very well. Have it so. But it would have been easier for Susan to
hear it alone. Susan, there has been some dreadful, horrible mistake.
It was not you, Susan, whom Lord Ruddington saw at Derlingham and in
Traxelby church. He was misinformed. He has never seen you in his life.
He does not want to marry you."
Susan stared at me, first, with a face as white as chalk. Then she
reddened like a rose, and moaned like one wounded, with a choking moan.
"No, Miss Gertrude, no!" she pleaded in anguish, "Don’t say it wasn’t
real. Don’t say..."
"My poor Susan," I answered, "it wasn’t real. But what does it matter?
You have given him up for Gibson."
"No," she cried, with a sudden burst of wild and terrible grief. "I
didn’t, I didn’t, I didn’t! He wasn’t mine to give."
I hesitated, wondering whether to tell her that Ruddington had indeed
been hers to give, because he was willing to sacrifice himself to the
end. But I decided not to try her poor wits any more.
"You are wrong, Susan," I said gently. "It’s true he wasn’t yours to
give. But you believed he was. It is all the same. Gibson, she gave
up money, and luxury, and a splendid name, all for you!"
"And, if you please, Ma’am," demanded Gibson, "how do we know all this
is true? If it wasn’t Susan he saw in Derlingham, who was it? If he
didn’t fall in love with Susan, who did he fall in love with? If he
doesn’t want to marry Susan, who is it that he does want to marry? No,
Ma’am, I’m not taking any more risks. To-morrow, perhaps, we shall find
it’s Susan after all."
I turned to beckon towards the high bush. But Ruddington was already
over the stones, I saw him and held my tongue. He came so quietly, so
masterfully, that I knew I had only to listen and look on.
"You are Susan?" he said kindly in her ear.
Susan looked up and gave a piercing shriek.
"It’s him, it’s him!" she screamed.
"Don’t be afraid, Susan," he said gently. "Miss Langley has told you
that you have no more to fear. Some other day, you shall know all.
To-night, let me just tell you, on my honour, that it was not my fault.
If it had been my fault, I should never forgive myself for causing you
all this worry and pain. Depend on me to do all I can to make you and
Gibson happy. Tell me that you will try to forgive me."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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