Susan Clegg and Her Friend Mrs. Lathrop — John Shaqi
Susan Clegg and Her Friend Mrs. LathropWarner, Anne
General
Susan Clegg and Her Friend Mrs. Lathrop
Warner, Anne
Humorous stories; United States -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
"I know, 'n' that's one thing 't 's been troublin' me. It's written
out in good plain letters--'Blank Clegg'--'n' I've been tryin' 'n'
tryin' to think what I could 'a' said to 'a' made him suppose 't it
could 'a' been 'Blank.' That 'd be the last name in the wide world for
anybody to name anybody else, I sh'd suppose, 'n' I can't see for the
life o' me why that monument man sh'd 'a' hit on it for father. I'm
cert'nly mighty glad that he's only marked it on in black chalk 'n'
not chopped it out o' the bottom o' the lion. O' course 'f he 'd
chopped it out I'd 'a' had to 'a' taken it an' it'd jus' made me the
laughin'-stock o' the whole community. I know lots o' folks 't are
plenty mean enough 's to say 't that lion was weepin' because I didn't
know my own father's name."
Mrs. Lathrop looked sober.
"So I guess I've got to go to town by to-day's ten o'clock. I ain't no
intention o' takin' the lion, but I _shall_ like to stand off a little
ways 'n' look at the part o' the name 't 's spelt right. Later maybe
I'll visit a few asylums--I ain't sure. But anyway I thought I'd jus'
run over 'n' let you know 't I was goin', 'n' ask you if there's
anythin' 't I can get f'r you while I'm in town."
"No, there isn't," said Mrs. Lathrop with great firmness.
Susan rose to go.
"I'm thinkin' o' buyin' the Shores baby outfit," she said. "I guess
Mr. Shores 'll be glad to sell it cheap. They say 't he can't bear to
be reminded o' the baby, 'n' I don't well see what else the crib 'n'
the baby carriage can remind him of."
"I wonder if the sewing-machine reminds him o' Mrs. Shores," said Mrs.
Lathrop. "I'd be glad to buy it if it did 'n' 'f he was wantin' to
sell it cheap."
"I dunno why it sh'd remind him o' Mrs. Shores," said Susan; "she
never sewed on it none. She never did nothin' 's far 's I c'd make out
except to sit on the front porch 'n' talk to his clerk. My, but I sh'd
think he 'd hate the sight o' that front porch. If it c'd be got off,
I 'd like to buy that of him too. My front porch 's awful old 'n'
shaky 'n' I 'll need a good porch to wheel baby on. He c'd take my
porch in part payment. It's bein' so old 'n' shaky wouldn't matter to
him I don't suppose, for I 'll bet a dollar he 'll never let no other
wife o' his sit out on no porch o' his, not 'ntil after he's dead 'n'
buried anyway; 'n' as for sittin' on a porch himself, well, all is I
know 't if it was me it 'd scorch my rockers."
"What time do you think 't you '11 get back?" asked Mrs. Lathrop.
"I ain't sure. 'F I should get real interested huntin' orphans, I
might stay until it was too dark to see 'em good. I can't tell nothin'
about it, though. You 'd better watch for the light in the kitchen,
'n' when you see it burnin' I wish 't you'd come right over."
Mrs. Lathrop agreed to this arrangement, and Miss Clegg went home to
get ready for town.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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