So I seek a man who is perfectly just and true, That he may be perfectly good and I may love him. I am only a child, Tête-d'or, but I tell you I have within me A thing older than I, And it has its own secret source and seeks its own end, in spite of my sodden intellect and unsure senses, and it makes my life bitter. But I open my eyes and see the sun as it rises and sets, And nature, and I find no happiness there. And I see other men and they are like myself. To which of them shall I speak? I shall speak to him and he will make reply. Each cries, "Like us you must pay for the right to be alive!" But as I say I have no handicraft, I can only pay with myself. And all men are full of faults, --But you, do you think that such a man exists? TÊTE-D'OR: You lay your hand on an old wound!--He exists. CÉBÈS: He exists then. But which of us speaks and is not understood? Has he rejected me, or am I in any way to blame? I bear witness to the Truth That there is nothing here I am not ready to leave behind as one rises from a chair. But I see a fly, a plant, a stone, yet him I do not see. And if I do not find him why have my eyes been dowered with the faculty of seeing, and my hands with fingers as if they saw! For I raise my hands and move them here and there! And will someone speak of self-control and of works of betterment by which the noble man consecrates himself like a temple? I do not care to be loved. But I know how to love and I would see and have! And against these sure desires there is only a vague perhaps. And why will it later be otherwise? For I am made of flesh and blood, as my mother made me. TÊTE-D'OR: What is it? You look at me strangely and there is something in you that I do not recognise. CÉBÈS: You have come, O Conqueror, To all the rest like the promise of a future of happy days! For me alone you bring no rescue! TÊTE-D'OR: What do you mean? CÉBÈS (_lying down again_): I am dying. TÊTE-D'OR: What did you say? CÉBÈS: What the doctors told me, and it is the truth. TÊTE-D'OR: No! CÉBÈS: I shall not live through another night. I shall not live till noon. TÊTE-D'OR: No! No! CÉBÈS: It is not the pain that I fear, and the cramps, and the horrible struggle to vomit, When my mouth is filled with bile and blood and the sweat pours out of my body like water from a sponge. This I can bear, for my heart is stout, and I shall look in your face, my brother, in the hour of my torture. Why was I born? For I die and then I shall exist no more. The shadows had closed about me so that I slept in darkness and woke in darkness. And I saw nothing; and I was deaf and heard no sound. For I am like a man buried alive, and I am confined as in an oven! Give me light! Give me light! Give me light! Give me light! For I would see! Give me air, for I stifle! Give me to drink, for I do not want the water that they bring me. But you, give me water to drink, that I may die in peace, for I am consumed with thirst!