Perhaps those most prize society who find the best in solitude, being
equal to either; strong enough to enjoy themselves aside from companies
they would gladly meet and repay by a freedom from prejudices and
scruples in which these share and pride themselves, yet whose
exclusiveness thrusts them out of their own houses and themselves also.
"It ever hath been known,
They others' virtues scorn who doubt their own."
If solitude makes us love ourselves, society gives us to others,
peopling what were else a solitude. It takes us out of ourselves as from
a multitude to partake of closer intimacies and satisfactions. Alone and
apart, however well occupied, we lose the elasticity and dignity that
come from sympathy with the aims and prospects of others. Nor has any
been found equal to uninterrupted solitude. Our virtues need the enamel
of intercourse. Exalting us above our private piques, prejudices,
egotisms, into the commonwealth of charities, good company makes us
catholic, courteous, sane; we retire from it with a new estimate of
ourselves and of mankind. If intercourse have not this wholesome effect,
it is dissipating and best shunned. Nor is fellowship possible without a
certain delicacy and respect of diffidence. There hides a natural piety
in this personal grace, while nothing good comes of brass, from whose
embrasures there vollies forth but impudence, insolence, defiance. But
the more influential powers are attended by a bashful genius, and step
forth from themselves with a delicacy of boldness alike free from any
blemishes of egotism or pretence. Nor do we accept as genuine the person
not characterized by this blushing bashfulness, this youthfulness of
heart, this sensibility to the sentiment of suavity and self-respect.
Modesty is bred of self-reverence. Fine manners are the mantle of fair
minds. None are truly great without this ornament. A fine genius has the
timidity, the graces of a virgin nature, whose traits are as transparent
in the boldest flights of imagination as discernible in the stateliest
tread of reason, the play of fancy: a pleasing hesitancy, a refrain,
setting off the more boldly by such graceful carriage, the natural
graces due to beauty and truth; and bearing down all else by its
charming persuasions.
Affinities tell. Every one is not for every one; nor any one good enough
to flatter or scorn any; the kindly recognition being due to the
meanest; even the humblest conferring a certain respect by his call. Yet
one might as properly entertain every passing vagary in the presence
chamber of his memory as every vagrant visitor seeking his acquaintance.
Introductions are of small account. What are one's claims, a glance
detects; if ours, he stays, and house and heart are his by silent
understanding. If not ours, nor we his, the way is plain. He leaves
presently as a traveller the innkeeper's door, an inmate for his meal
only and the night.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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