How he had come to deserve this wealth, any more than how he had formerly
earned disgrace at home, was a problem beyond the reach of his
philosophy. It was true that he had been industrious at the bank, but no
more so than the cashier, who had seven small children and was visibly
sinking in decline. Nor was the step which had determined his advance—a
visit to a dive with a month’s wages in his pocket—an act of such
transcendent virtue, or even wisdom, as to seem to merit the favour of
the gods. From some sense of this, and of the dizzy see-saw—heaven-high,
hell-deep—on which men sit clutching; or perhaps fearing that the sources
of his fortune might be insidiously traced to some root in the field of
petty cash; he stuck to his work, said not a word of his new
circumstances, and kept his account with a bank in a different quarter of
the town. The concealment, innocent as it seems, was the first step in
the second tragicomedy of John’s existence.
Meanwhile, he had never written home. Whether from diffidence or shame,
or a touch of anger, or mere procrastination, or because (as we have
seen) he had no skill in literary arts, or because (as I am sometimes
tempted to suppose) there is a law in human nature that prevents young
men—not otherwise beasts—from the performance of this simple act of
piety—months and years had gone by, and John had never written. The
habit of not writing, indeed, was already fixed before he had begun to
come into his fortune; and it was only the difficulty of breaking this
long silence that withheld him from an instant restitution of the money
he had stolen or (as he preferred to call it) borrowed. In vain he sat
before paper, attending on inspiration; that heavenly nymph, beyond
suggesting the words ‘my dear father,’ remained obstinately silent; and
presently John would crumple up the sheet and decide, as soon as he had
‘a good chance,’ to carry the money home in person. And this delay,
which is indefensible, was his second step into the snares of fortune.
Ten years had passed, and John was drawing near to thirty. He had kept
the promise of his boyhood, and was now of a lusty frame, verging toward
corpulence; good features, good eyes, a genial manner, a ready laugh, a
long pair of sandy whiskers, a dash of an American accent, a close
familiarity with the great American joke, and a certain likeness to a
R-y-l P-rs-n-ge, who shall remain nameless for me, made up the man’s
externals as he could be viewed in society. Inwardly, in spite of his
gross body and highly masculine whiskers, he was more like a maiden lady
than a man of twenty-nine.
It chanced one day, as he was strolling down Market Street on the eve of
his fortnight’s holiday, that his eye was caught by certain railway
bills, and in very idleness of mind he calculated that he might be home
for Christmas if he started on the morrow. The fancy thrilled him with
desire, and in one moment he decided he would go.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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