WHENE'ER the painter had in hand a fair, He'd jest his wife, and laugh with easy air; But Hymen's rights proceeding as they ought, With jealous fears her breast was never fraught. She might indeed repay his tricks in kind, And gratify, in soft amours, her mind, Except that she less confidence had shown, And was not led to him the truth to own. AMONG the men attracted by her smiles, Two neighbours, much delighted with her wiles; Were often tempted, by her sprightly wit, To listen to her chat, and with her sit; For she had far the most engaging mien, Of any charmer that around was seen. Superior understanding she possessed; Though fond of laughter, frolick, fun, and jest. She to her husband presently disclosed The love these cit-gallants to her proposed; Both known for arrant blockheads through the town, And ever boasting of their own renown. To him she gave their various speeches, tones, Each silly air: their tears, and sighs, and groans; They'd read, or rather heard, we may believe, That, when in love, with sighs fond bosoms heave. Their utmost to succeed these coxcombs tried, And seemed convinced they should not be denied; A common cause they would the business hold, And what one knew the other must be told. Whichever first a favour might obtain, Should tell his happiness to t'other swain. YE FAIR 'tis thus they oft your kindness treat: The pleasure that he wished alone is sweet. LOVE, is no more; of t'other, laid in earth, We've here no traces scarcely from the birth. You serve for sport and prey, to giddy youth, Devoid of talents, principles, and truth. 'Tis right they should suppose, still two are found; Who take their course continually round. The first that in your pleasure grounds appears; I'd have you, on his wings, to use the shears. OUR lady then, her lovers to deceive, One day observed--you shall, my friends, this eve; Drink wine with me:--my husband will away, And, what's delightful, till to-morrow stay; We shall ourselves be able to amuse, And laugh, and sing, and talk as we may choose. 'Tis excellent, cried they: things well you frame; And at the promised hour, the heroes came.