lucky for her she had a few thousands of her own, which had been left to
her by a good grandmother, and these were very convenient to begin with.
My master and my lady set out in great style; they had the finest coach
and chariot, and horses and liveries, and cut the greatest dash in the
county, returning their wedding visits: and it was immediately reported,
that her father had undertaken to pay all my master’s debts, and of
course all his tradesmen gave him a new credit, and every thing went on
smack smooth, and I could not but admire my lady’s spirit, and was proud
to see Castle Rackrent again in all its glory. My lady had a fine taste
for building, and furniture, and playhouses, and she turned every thing
topsy-turvy, and made the barrack-room into a theatre, as she called it,
and she went on as if she had a mint of money at her elbow; and, to be
sure, I thought she knew best, especially as Sir Condy said nothing to
it one way or the other. All he asked, God bless him! was to live in
peace and quietness, and have his bottle or his whiskey punch at night
to himself. Now this was little enough, to be sure, for any gentleman;
but my lady couldn’t abide the smell of the whiskey punch. “My dear,”
says he, “you liked it well enough before we were married, and why not
now?” “My dear,” said she, “I never smelt it, or I assure you I should
never have prevailed upon myself to marry you.” “My dear, I am sorry
you did not smell it; but we can’t help that now,” returned my master,
without putting himself in a passion, or going out of his way, but just
fair and easy helped himself to another glass, and drank it off to her
good health. All this the butler told me, who was going backwards and
forwards unnoticed with the jug, and hot water, and sugar, and all he
thought wanting. Upon my master’s swallowing the last glass of whiskey
punch, my lady burst into tears, calling him an ungrateful, base,
barbarous wretch! and went off into a fit of hysterics, as I think Mrs.
Jane called it, and my poor master was greatly frightened, this being
the first thing of the kind he had seen; and he fell straight on his
knees before her, and, like a good-hearted cratur as he was, ordered the
whiskey punch out of the room, and bid ‘em throw open all the windows,
and cursed himself: and then my lady came to herself again, and when
she saw him kneeling there, bid him get up, and not forswear himself any
more, for that she was sure he did not love her, and never had: this
we learned from Mrs. Jane, who was the only person left present at all
this. “My dear,” returns my master, thinking, to be sure, of Judy, as
well he might, “whoever told you so is an incendiary, and I’ll have ‘em
turned out of the house this minute, if you’ll only let me know which
of them it was.” “Told me what?” said my lady, starting upright in her
chair. “Nothing at all, nothing at all,” said my master, seeing he had
overshot himself, and that my lady spoke at random; “but what you said
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