“Ah! vous avez raison, monsieur, c’est la plus belle chevelure! Mais
entrez donc, monsieur,” cried Josephine, whom I can never teach to
comprehend or respect English customs, “Eh! entrez, entrez, monsieur;
madame est à sa toilette.”
As I looked up I could not forbear smiling at the extreme ease and
decision of Josephine’s manner, and the excessive doubt and anxiety
in the gentleman’s appearance. My smile, which, Heaven knows, meant
no encouragement, decided him; timidity instantly gave way to joy; he
entered. What was to be done? I could not turn him out again; I was not
answerable for any foolish conclusions he might draw, from what he ought
in politeness to have considered as a thing of course. All I could do
was to blame Josephine for being a French woman. To defend her, and
flatter me, was the gentleman’s part; and, for an Englishman, he really
acquitted himself with tolerable grace. Josephine at least was pleased,
and she found such a perpetual employment for monsieur, and his advice
was so necessary, that there was no chance of his departure: so we
talked of French _toilettes_, &c. &c. in French, for Josephine’s
edification: L---- paid me some compliments upon the recovery of my
looks after my illness--I thought I looked terribly languid--but he
assured me that this languor, in his eyes, was an additional grace; I
could not understand this: he fancied that must be because he did not
express himself well in French; he explained himself more clearly in
English, which Josephine, you know, does not understand, so that she
was now forced to be silent, and I was compelled to take my share in
the conversation. L---- made me comprehend, that languor, indicating
sensibility of heart, was to him the most touching of female charms; I
sighed, and took up the book I had been reading; it was the new novel
which you sent me, dear Gabrielle; I talked of it, in hopes of
changing the course of the conversation; alas! this led to one far more
dangerous: he looked at the passage I had been reading. This brought us
back to sensibility again--to sentiments and descriptions so terribly
apposite! we found such a similarity in our tastes! Yet L---- spoke only
in general, and he preserved a command over himself, which provoked me,
though I knew it to be coquetry; I saw the struggle in his mind, and
was determined to force him to be candid, and to enjoy my triumph. With
these views I went farther than I had intended. The charm of sensibility
he had told me was to him irresistible. Alas! I let him perceive all
the weakness of my heart.--Sensibility is the worst time-keeper in
the world. We were neither of us aware of its progressive motion. The
Swiss--my evil genius--the Swiss knocked at the door to let me know
dinner was served. Dinner! on what vulgar incidents the happiness of
life depends! Dinner came between the discovery of my sentiments and
that declaration of passion which I now must hear--or die.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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