At first the ascent had seemed tedious enough, as dull as the trudge to
her other lessons. Lizzie was not a heaven-sent teacher; she had no born
zeal for her calling, and though she dealt kindly and dutifully with her
pupils, she did not fly to them on winged feet. But one day something
had happened to change the face of life, and since then the climb to the
Deering house had seemed like a dream-flight up a heavenly stairway.
Her heart beat faster as she remembered it--no longer in a tumult of
fright and self-reproach, but softly, peacefully, as if brooding over a
possession that none could take from her.
It was on a day of the previous October that she had stopped, after
Juliet’s lesson, to ask if she might speak to Juliet’s papa. One had
always to apply to Mr. Deering if there was anything to be said about
the lessons. Mrs. Deering lay on her lounge up-stairs, reading greasy
relays of dog-eared novels, the choice of which she left to the cook
and the nurse, who were always fetching them for her from the _cabinet
de lecture;_ and it was understood in the house that she was not to be
“bothered” about Juliet. Mr. Deering’s interest in his daughter was
fitful rather than consecutive; but at least he was approachable, and
listened sympathetically, if a little absently, stroking his long, fair
mustache, while Lizzie stated her difficulty or put in her plea for maps
or copy-books.
“Yes, yes--of course--whatever you think right,” he would always assent,
sometimes drawing a five-franc piece from his pocket, and laying it
carelessly on the table, or oftener saying, with his charming smile:
“Get what you please, and just put it on your account, you know.”
But this time Lizzie had not come to ask for maps or copy-books, or
even to hint, in crimson misery,--as once, poor soul! she had had
to do,--that Mr. Deering had overlooked her last little account had
probably not noticed that she had left it, some two months earlier, on
a corner of his littered writing-table. That hour had been bad enough,
though he had done his best to make it easy to carry it off gallantly
and gaily; but this was infinitely worse. For she had come to complain
of her pupil; to say that, much as she loved little Juliet, it was
useless, unless Mr. Deering could “do something,” to go on with the
lessons.
“It wouldn’t be honest--I should be robbing you; I’m not sure that I
haven’t already,” she half laughed, through mounting tears, as she
put her case. Little Juliet would not work, would not obey. Her poor,
little, drifting existence floated aimlessly between the kitchen and the
_lingerie_, and all the groping tendrils of her curiosity were fastened
about the doings of the backstairs.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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