That was the turning point in the life of Eliphaz. Up to that moment
he had been a lonely crank, and men thought he was queer; but now
there were two of them and he became a Movement. A Movement in England
may do what it likes: there was a Movement, before the War, for
spoiling tulips in Kew Gardens and breaking church windows; it had its
run like the rest.
The name of Eliphaz’s new friend was Ezekiel Pim: and they drew up
rules for their Movement almost at once; and very soon country inns
knew Eliphaz no more. And for some while they missed him where he used
to drop in of an evening to tell them they were all damned: and then a
man proved one day that the earth was flat, and they all forgot
Eliphaz.
But Eliphaz went to Hyde Park and Ezekiel Pim went with him, and there
you would see them close to the Marble Arch on any fine Sunday
afternoon, preaching their Movement to the people of London. “You are
all damned,” said Eliphaz. “Your portion shall be damnation for
everlasting.”
“All damned,” added Ezekiel.
Eliphaz was the orator. He would picture Hell to you as it really is.
He made you see pretty much what it will be like to wriggle and turn
and squirm, and never escape from burning. But Ezekiel Pim, though he
seldom said more than three words, uttered those words with such
alarming sincerity and had such a sure conviction shining in his eyes
that searched right in your face as he said them, and his long hair
waved so weirdly as his head shot forward when he said “You’re all
damned,” that Ezekiel Pim brought home to you that the vivid
descriptions of Eliphaz really applied to you.
People who lead bad lives get their sensibilities hardened. These did
not care very much what Eliphaz said. But girls at school, and several
governesses, and even some young clergy, were very much affected.
Eliphaz Griggs and Ezekiel Pim seemed to bring Hell so near to you.
You could almost feel it baking the Marble Arch from two to four on
Sundays. And at four o’clock the Surbiton Branch of the International
Anarchists used to come along, and Eliphaz Griggs and Ezekiel Pim
would pack up their flag and go, for the pitch belonged to the
Surbiton people till six; and the crank Movements punctiliously
recognize each other’s rights. If they fought among themselves, which
is quite unthinkable, the police would run them in; it is the one
thing that an anarchist in England may never do.
When the War came the two speakers doubled their efforts. The way they
looked at it was that here was a counter-attraction taking people’s
minds off the subject of their own damnation just as they had got them
to think about it. Eliphaz worked as he had never worked before; he
spared nobody; but it was still Ezekiel Pim who somehow brought it
most home to them.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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