He made a grimace. "All these arguments, you know, Hilton, are June's.
I've heard them over and over again during the past week.... Haven't you
anything new--something you've only just thought of--something bright
and original--anything--anything--I don't care a damn what it is so long
as I haven't heard it before?"
I thought he was sneering until I saw his eyes. They were full of a
curious, child-like eagerness--an eagerness that almost _tore_ through
them. Something new--something bright and original--something he hadn't
heard before ... it was his heart-cry always.
I said: "I'm sorry. There isn't anything new to say. It's just that,
quite sincerely, June and I believe that the best service we can do for
Terry is to leave things alone."
"You've changed your mind, then, since the last time we talked about
it?"
"Yes, I have."
Then he said, quietly and almost casually: "Very well then, we'll drop
the matter."
II
_Drop the matter_! And June was speechless. She went towards him as if
she would have hugged him, but remembering his fragility in time, kissed
him warmly on the lips. It seemed to please him; he patted her head and
told her that he quite realized her little game of throwing me into the
fray at the last minute, as Napoleon threw in his guards at Waterloo.
And all she could reply then was: "You dear--_dear_--to have given up
your beautiful trial-scene--for I know--I understand--how much you were
looking forward to it."
He said, patting her head again: "Wait till that Chicago fellow has
finished with me. Then I'll have all the trial-scenes I want."
She couldn't reply to that at all; I could see her eyes filling and
brimming over with tears. I intervened then myself, telling him how glad
and grateful I was, and how much I hoped that the future would bring
recovery to him. And when I had finished he said, quite in his old
half-mocking tone again: "That's very nice of you. Now let's be as
sentimental as we can about it--and, to begin with, let us all cry."
Perhaps we should have cried but for his saying that. As it was we
laughed, June, he and I; and then suddenly I noticed Helen. She wasn't
laughing and she wasn't crying either; she was just looking dreadfully
in front of her, with cheeks pale and lips tightened; and when she
caught my eye she said, quickly and sharply: "So you're _not_ going to
tell Terry?"
We looked at her, all of us; the centre of gravity had suddenly shifted.
"That's what we've decided," I said.
"You're satisfied for him to get what happiness he can out of
ignorance?"
"Well--if you put it that way--yes."
She bit her lips till they were almost white. Then, in the midst of the
tense, expectant silence, she retorted: "I'm _not_ satisfied, and I
never will be. And if you aren't going to tell him the truth, then I
am...."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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