English language -- Dialects -- England -- Lancashire -- Texts; Lancashire (England) -- Fiction; Short stories
"As I've yerd th' tale, this new organ wur tried for th' first time at
mornin' sarvice, th' next day. Dick-o'-Liddy's, th' bass singer, wur
pike't eawt to look after it, as he wur an' owd hond at music; an' th'
parson would ha' gan him a bit of a lesson, th' neet before, how to
manage it, like. But Dick reckon't that nobody'd no 'casion to larn him
nought belungin' sich like things as thoose. It wur a bonny come off if
a chap that had been a noted bass-singer five-and-forty year, an' could
tutor a claronet wi' ony mon i' Rosenda Forest, couldn't manage a
box-organ,--beawt bein' teyched wi' a parson. So they gav him th' keys,
and leet him have his own road. Well, o' Sunday forenoon, as soon as th'
first hymn wur gan out, Dick whisper't round to th' folk i'th
singin'-pew, 'Now for't! Mind yor hits! Aw 'm beawn to set it agate!'
An' then he went, an' wun th' organ up, an' it started a-playin'
'French;' an' th' singers followed, as weel as they could, in a slattery
sort of a way. But some on 'em didn't like it. They reckon't that they
made nought o' singin' to machinery. Well, when th' hymn wur done, th'
parson said, 'Let us pray,' an' down they went o' their knees. But just
as folk wur gettin' their e'en nicely shut, an' their faces weel hud i'
their hats, th' organ banged off again, wi' th' same tune. 'Hello!' said
Dick, jumpin' up, 'th' divle's oft again, bith mass!' Then he darted at
th' organ; an' he rooted about wi' th' keys, tryin' to stop it. But th'
owd lad wur i' sich a fluster, that istid o' stoppin' it, he swapped th'
barrel to another tune. That made him warse nor ever. Owd Thwittler
whisper'd to him, 'Thire, Dick; thae's shapt that nicely! Give it
another twirl, owd bird!' Well, Dick sweat, an' futter't about till he
swapped th' barrel again. An' then he looked round th' singin'-pew, as
helpless as a kittlin'; an' he said to th' singers, 'Whatever mun aw do,
folk?' an' tears coom into his e'en. 'Roll it o'er,' said Thwittler.
'Come here, then,' said Dick. So they roll't it o'er, as if they wanted
to teem th' music out on it, like ale oat of a pitcher. But the organ
yowlt on; and Dick went wur an' wur. 'Come here, yo singers,' said Dick,
'come here; let's sit us down on't! Here, Sarah; come, thee; thou'rt a
fat un!' An' they sit 'em down on it; but o' wur no use. Th' organ wur
reet ony end up; an' they couldn't smoor th' sound. At last Dick gav in;
an' he leant o'er th' front o' th' singin'-pew, wi' th' sweat runnin'
down his face; an' he sheawted across to th' parson, 'Aw cannot stop it!
I wish yo'd send somebry up.' Just then owd Pudge, th' bang-beggar, coom
runnin' into th' pew, an' he fot Dick a sous at back o' th' yed wi' his
pow, an' he said, 'Come here, Dick; thou'rt a foo. Tak howd; an' let's
carry it eawt.' Dick whisked round an' rubbed his yed, an' he said, 'Aw
say, Pudge, keep that pow to thisel', or else I'll send my shoon against
thoose ribbed stockin's o' thine.' But he went an' geet howd, an' him
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account