Good folks, you’ve inkwired at home and abroad, Ha we’re gettin’ on wi wur famous railroad; And wen I’ve tell’d yo th’ disasters we’ve hed, Yo’ve greev’d monny a time wal yo’ve tain to yor bed, But ha yo will gape wen yo read farther daan, Wat famons big stirrins we’ve hed up i’th’ taan. I know yo’d be mad as soin as yo heard, Abaat that oud kaa at belonged to Blue Beard, For I like as I saw yo just hod of its tail, And braying it rump wi th’ end o’ yor flail; For I wisht monny a time at yo’d been here, For swallowing th’ plan yo’d a geen it wat cheer. Ha iver, good folk, I’ll try to be breef, For I know yo’re i’ pain and I’ll give yo releef— So to tell yo the truth in a plain honest way, Th’ railroad is finish’d an oppen’d to-day; An’ I’ve tain up mi pen, for ill yo’d a tain’t If I hedn’t a geen yo a truthful ackaant. Hasumever, this morning as I tell’d yo before, I wur wakken’d wi hearin a awful uproar, Wat wi th’ prating o’ women an’ shaating o’th’ folk, An’ th’ bells ’at wur ringin, it wur past ony joke, For ivery two minits thay shaated huray, We are na baan to oppen th’ Haworth Railway. So I jump’d up i’ bed, an’ I gat on the floor, I slipt on mi cloas an’ ran aat door, An’ th’ first at I met, it wur one Jimmy Peg, He’d cum’d up fra Bockin an brout a gert fleg, An’ just at his heels wur th’ Spring-headed band, Playing a march—I thout it wur grand. So I fell into th’ step for I knaw how to march, For I’ve been stiffen’d up wi’ guvernment starch; An’ first smell o’ music it makes me fair dance An’ I prick us mi ears like a trooper his lance, Hasumever, I thout as I’d gotten the scent, I’d follow this music wharever it went. Then I march’d up erect, wal I cum to th’ grand stand, An’ that wur at th’ stashun whare th’ train hed to land Thare wur flags of all nations, fra th’ Union Jack To Bacchus an’ Atlas wi’ th’ globe on his back, For th’ Inspector and Conductor, and all sorls o’ fray, Wur expected directly to land at th’ railway. So I stared until both een wur varry near bleared, An’ waited an’ waited—at last it appeared, It wur filled full o’ folk as eggs full o’ meat, An’ it tuk four engines to bring it up reight, Two hed long chimlas an’ tuther hed noan, But thay stuck weel together like a dog to a boan. They wur gruntin’ an’ growlin’ wur th’ folk at gat aat, So I made sum inquiries wat it wur abaat; For i’ all mi born days I ne’er heard nowt so called, For three or four times thay sed it hed stall’d Wal sum o’th’ crookt-legg’d ens bethout of a scheam, An’ thay went back to Keighla for a hamper o’ steam.