A lady who was visiting the home of a friend had just given each of the children a penny. When the savings bank was produced and the coins were deposited therein, the lady made the remark that the children had a lot of money. "Oh, yes," said little Mary. "Mamma is very good to us. Every time we take our castor oil without crying she gives us a penny." "And what do you do with all the money?" asked the visitor. "Why, mamma buys some more castor oil with it!" *IT WOULD DEPEND* Franklin B. Gowen at one time tried a case in court against a man who was defended by a lawyer named Browne. The issue involved was an important one and every point was vigorously contested. During the trial Mr. Gowen frequently referred to Mr. Browne as "Mr. Brow-nie," which embarrassed the lawyer so much that the presiding judge noticed it. "Mr. Gowen, the name of the plaintiff’s counsel is Browne, not Brow-nie. Now, my name is Greene, G-r-e-e-n-e, and you wouldn’t call me Gree-nie, would you?" To which Mr. Gowen replied, "That will depend altogether on how you decide this case." *NECESSARY LABOR* The other Sunday two small boys were industriously digging in a vacant lot, when a man who was passing stopped to give them a lecture. "Don’t you know that it is a sin to dig on Sunday, unless it be a case of necessity?" asked the good man. "Yes, sir," timidly replied one of the boys. "Then why don’t you stop it?" "’Cause this is a case of necessity," replied the little philosopher. "A feller can’t fish without bait." *THE RETORT COURTEOUS* Daniel Webster was noted for his ready wit, and the following example of it is told by a man whose father heard the statesman’s retort: Webster was standing one afternoon on Pennsylvania Avenue, in Washington, talking with a Senator from South Carolina. Between them there was a certain ill-concealed enmity. As they were talking a drove of mules was driven past them. The Senator remarked: "Webster, why don’t you bow? There go some of your constituents." Quick as a flash Webster took off his hat, and, bowing gravely, replied: "Yes, Senator, we are sending them down South to teach school." *A RESPONSIVE CHORD* A woman of Madison County, New York, was in Washington during the second term of President Cleveland and with her husband took occasion to go to see the chief executive at one of the large public receptions. All was new and grand to the couple, but the sight of the endless line of handshakers elicited the genuine sympathy of the old woman for the First Lady of the Land. No doubt, this feeling was considerably stimulated by her own weariness from long standing in line, which had about exhausted her strength as well as her patience. When finally she did reach the president and his wife, she exclaimed: "Mrs. Cleveland, be you very tired?"