THE $30,000 BEQUEST and Other Stories by Mark Twain (Samuel L. Clemens) CONTENTS THE $30,000 BEQUEST CHAPTER I CHAPTER II CHAPTER III CHAPTER IV CHAPTER V CHAPTER VI CHAPTER VII CHAPTER VIII A DOG'S TALE CHAPTER I CHAPTER II CHAPTER III WAS IT HEAVEN? OR HELL? CHAPTER I CHAPTER II CHAPTER III CHAPTER IV CHAPTER V CHAPTER VI CHAPTER VII CHAPTER VIII CHAPTER IX CHAPTER X A CURE FOR THE BLUES THE CURIOUS BOOK THE CALIFORNIAN'S TALE A HELPLESS SITUATION A TELEPHONIC CONVERSATION EDWARD MILLS AND GEORGE BENTON: A TALE THE FIVE BOONS OF LIFE Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V THE FIRST WRITING-MACHINES ITALIAN WITHOUT A MASTER ITALIAN WITH GRAMMAR A BURLESQUE BIOGRAPHY HOW TO TELL A STORY GENERAL WASHINGTON'S NEGRO BODY-SERVANT WIT INSPIRATIONS OF THE “TWO-YEAR-OLDS” AN ENTERTAINING ARTICLE A LETTER TO THE SECRETARY OF THE TREASURY AMENDED OBITUARIES A MONUMENT TO ADAM A HUMANE WORD FROM SATAN INTRODUCTION TO “THE NEW GUIDE OF THE CONVERSATION IN PORTUGUESE AND ENGLISH” ADVICE TO LITTLE GIRLS POST-MORTEM POETRY (1) THE DANGER OF LYING IN BED PORTRAIT OF KING WILLIAM III DOES THE RACE OF MAN LOVE A LORD? EXTRACTS FROM ADAM'S DIARY EVE'S DIARY EXTRACT FROM ADAM'S DIARY THE $30,000 BEQUEST CHAPTER I Lakeside was a pleasant little town of five or six thousand inhabitants, and a rather pretty one, too, as towns go in the Far West. It had church accommodations for thirty-five thousand, which is the way of the Far West and the South, where everybody is religious, and where each of the Protestant sects is represented and has a plant of its own. Rank was unknown in Lakeside--unconfessed, anyway; everybody knew everybody and his dog, and a sociable friendliness was the prevailing atmosphere. Saladin Foster was book-keeper in the principal store, and the only high-salaried man of his profession in Lakeside. He was thirty-five years old, now; he had served that store for fourteen years; he had begun in his marriage-week at four hundred dollars a year, and had climbed steadily up, a hundred dollars a year, for four years; from that time forth his wage had remained eight hundred--a handsome figure indeed, and everybody conceded that he was worth it.