The Adventures of My Cousin SmoothTempleton, Timothy
General
The Adventures of My Cousin Smooth
Templeton, Timothy
Pierce, Franklin, 1804-1869 -- Humor; United States -- Politics and government -- 1853-1857
herself respected at Vienna; to send an escort for Mr. Spence, who had
endeared himself to his fellow-countrymen in Constantinople; and to
send a jackass for Mister O'Sullivan, who had at Lisbon become
celebrated for his misfortunes at bagatelle and chess--to drum them
all together for the one grand object. As for Seymour, Pierce thought
it not good policy to disturb him, seeing that nothing had been heard
from him since he found his way to St. Petersburg. With such spirits
as these, Europe could not fail to be astonished; and then, when it
was borne in mind that the consideration of its distracted affairs was
the object No. I of such a Convention!
"While calmly cogitating the first and last move in the getting up of
the thing, my lodgings, '42, Bennet street, St. James's,' were invaded
by the man Dudley, who declared himself a special minister of
Mr. Pierce, who sent him as envoy in general to Mr. Smooth, under
whose directions he would proceed to get together the Congress at
Ostend. I examined his credentials carefully, and finding them of Mr.
Pierce's legitimate stripe, commenced comparing notes and arranging
the preliminaries. He said, Pierce told him I would have a hard tug
with old Buck, who was like an aged turtle, and never moved until a
great deal of fire was applied to his back: but then his friends said
he was fast, once he got going! Notwithstanding Buck had very
confidently told a friend or two there was no understanding Pierce,
Pierce said he understood him, and, with Saunders to lend a hand, the
getting steam on him would not be so much of a job, after all. I must
here say to the reader that we had not long proceeded with our
conversation before the fact that our man Dudley was commissioned to
play the part of Corporal Noggs to the fire-eating portion of the
Cabinet, at the small end of which Mister Pierce was appended,
discovered itself. This fact fully established, I sat down and
commissioned him, first--to keep his mouth shut; secondly, to proceed
immediately to the Continent and get together the boys; thirdly, to
enjoin upon every one the necessity of declaring the object of the
Convention to be the relief of mankind in general; and fourthly, to be
careful while in France that none of Consul Saunders' _epistles to all
oppressed citizens_ were found in his pocket,--that functionary being
held as the great revolutionary star, sent from the West to move the
dead waters of an Eastern world.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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