"Let me tell you what the fellows did!" he at last exclaimed triumphantly. "They took some healthy leaves and sprinkled them with sulphuric acid. This expert diagnosed it as shot-hole fungus--a kind that he had been looking for for years--a kind they have in Australia--" "You're another!" said the expert. "There is real shot-hole fungus here!" So the battle raged, but I shall not report it further. Juries of farmers have invariably decided against the learned and patient "smoke expert," and I have no desire to give the province a bad reputation as to blights and pests. I saw no evidences of them on either fruit or trees--but I'll wager that that real-estate agent will never again introduce his friend the "smoke expert" to a sympathetic and inquisitive visitor. So it was wherever I went. So it was at home in the country. Real estate is being traded in everywhere. A few months ago a writer in the "Toronto Globe" stated that Western Ontario is for sale. About the same time a writer in the "Saturday Evening Post" showed that the American corn belt is all for sale. People everywhere are ready to sell at a profit and move on. The result of all this was to fix in my mind the conviction that the world is for sale. One morning I awoke--or was I awake?--and found the world marvellously astir. A huge red flag hung down from the zenith and a jovial auctioneer with the moon for an auction block was about to offer the world for sale. Satan had foreclosed his mortgage, and Chaos, "The Anarch Old," was looking over the property as a prospective buyer. The Soul of Man, troubled and confused, was also in the market for the world and wondering if the only price he could offer--a list of irksome virtues--could possibly outweigh the alluring, shadowy, jazz-time pleasures that his opponent would flash before the nations. Bringing down his gavel with a crash that arrested the attention of the universe, the auctioneer began his harangue. "Look it over, gentlemen, look it over! Here is the greatest bargain ever offered for sale--a perfect prize package of a planet. It has been in existence a long time and all its possibilities are known. It is a perfect location for either a heaven or a hell, and has all the natural resources needed to make it one or the other. Its history shows the attempts that have been made in both directions. Let me recount them briefly. First, O Chaos, let me address myself to you.