The Age of Science: A Newspaper of the Twentieth CenturyCobbe, Frances Power
Science
The Age of Science: A Newspaper of the Twentieth Century
Cobbe, Frances Power
Dystopias -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Satire; Science fiction
An accident of the ordinary sort occurred last night to the new
Magnetic train, which was at the moment passing under the Channel,
about 10 miles from Dover. From messages sent by the portable electric
machine along the wires the moment before the catastrophe took place,
it would appear that the engineers have been again at fault in the
construction of the roof of the tunnel, and that the sea was rushing
in with such violence that little hopes were entertained of bringing
the train to the next watertight compartment. The result justified
these fears, for the whole compartment of the tunnel in which the
train was stopped is to-day entirely full of water, and it must be
assumed that the unfortunate passengers—numbering, it is supposed,
about 800—have been drowned like so many rats in a trap. The accident
is unfortunate for the proprietors of Submarine Tunnel Stock, and also
for several Insurance Companies, as extensive repairs will be
required; but Science teaches us to regard these occurrences with
composure, as serving to check the increase of a superabundant
population.
* * * * *
The Simian Educational Institute (on Frobel’s system), for members of
the Ape family, continues to attract the strongest interest. In
testing the educability of the Simian tribe we are solving one of the
most important problems of Science, and hitherto everything seems to
promise the triumphant success of the experiment. There are now among
the pupils at the Institute three Chimpanzees, whose grandfathers and
grandmothers have all been well-educated monkeys; so that the set of
the brain of these young people is already marked towards progress and
civilization. It is needless to observe that all the students are
required to wash and dress themselves every morning in the becoming
male and female habiliments provided by the taste of the Governors of
the Institute. Great pains are also taken with their manners at meal
times, and, to avoid temptation, nuts are not admitted at dessert. One
of the young gentlemen (Joseph Macacus Silenus, Esq., generally known
by his intimates as “Joe”) is said to exhibit extraordinary talents,
and to be able to answer any question in elementary science by means
of an alphabet and a system of knocks, which (in view of the yet
unconquerable speechlessness of monkeys) has been accepted as the best
substitute for language, having been formerly invented by an ingenious
race of impostors named Mediums, who flourished in the obscurity of
the Victorian age. The plan adopted in France, in deference to the
advice of the great French naturalist, M. Houzeau, to employ the
anthropoid apes as domestic servants, has proved, we are informed,
altogether successful in several families. Madame Le Singe, a fine
specimen of the Gorilla tribe, has acted for some months as
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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