Death -- Fiction; Forgiveness -- Fiction; Memory -- Fiction
He felt quite determined, as he walked away, never in his life to go near
her. She was perhaps a human being, but Creston oughtn’t to have shown
her without precautions, oughtn’t indeed to have shown her at all. His
precautions should have been those of a forger or a murderer, and the
people at home would never have mentioned extradition. This was a wife
for foreign service or purely external use; a decent consideration would
have spared her the injury of comparisons. Such was the first flush of
George Stransom’s reaction; but as he sat alone that night—there were
particular hours he always passed alone—the harshness dropped from it and
left only the pity. _He_ could spend an evening with Kate Creston, if
the man to whom she had given everything couldn’t. He had known her
twenty years, and she was the only woman for whom he might perhaps have
been unfaithful. She was all cleverness and sympathy and charm; her
house had been the very easiest in all the world and her friendship the
very firmest. Without accidents he had loved her, without accidents
every one had loved her: she had made the passions about her as regular
as the moon makes the tides. She had been also of course far too good
for her husband, but he never suspected it, and in nothing had she been
more admirable than in the exquisite art with which she tried to keep
every one else (keeping Creston was no trouble) from finding it out.
Here was a man to whom she had devoted her life and for whom she had
given it up—dying to bring into the world a child of his bed; and she had
had only to submit to her fate to have, ere the grass was green on her
grave, no more existence for him than a domestic servant he had replaced.
The frivolity, the indecency of it made Stransom’s eyes fill; and he had
that evening a sturdy sense that he alone, in a world without delicacy,
had a right to hold up his head. While he smoked, after dinner, he had a
book in his lap, but he had no eyes for his page: his eyes, in the
swarming void of things, seemed to have caught Kate Creston’s, and it was
into their sad silences he looked. It was to him her sentient spirit had
turned, knowing it to be of her he would think. He thought for a long
time of how the closed eyes of dead women could still live—how they could
open again, in a quiet lamplit room, long after they had looked their
last. They had looks that survived—had them as great poets had quoted
lines.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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