Humorous stories; Mistaken identity -- Fiction; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
He ran down the deserted hall toward the red lamp which he knew
indicated the place of a fire-escape. The door of the room beside it
was open. In the room the gas was burning full head; on a chair was a
pile of clothing. He ran to the window, could not get it up, but
smashed it with a chair, and stepped out on the landing of the
fire-escape; below him was a crowd of men, with a sprinkling of women
and youth, massed in a ruddy light. Must he go down in his spectral
night dress? No—this side of the house was not yet on fire except at
the further end; he would snatch on those clothes. Which he did. They
fitted well enough, though a trifle loosely, and they were just a shade
loud as to pattern. Also as to hat—which was of a new breed to him,
Buffalo Bill not having been to England yet. One side of the coat went
on, but the other side refused; one of its sleeves was turned up and
stitched to the shoulder. He started down without waiting to get it
loose, made the trip successfully, and was promptly hustled outside the
limit-rope by the police.
The cowboy hat and the coat but half on made him too much of a centre
of attraction for comfort, although nothing could be more profoundly
respectful, not to say deferential, than was the manner of the crowd
toward him. In his mind he framed a discouraged remark for early entry
in his diary: “It is of no use; they know a lord through any disguise,
and show awe of him—even something very like fear, indeed.”
Presently one of the gaping and adoring half-circle of boys ventured a
timid question. My lord answered it. The boys glanced wonderingly at
each other and from somewhere fell the comment:
“_English_ cowboy! Well, if that ain’t curious.”
Another mental note to be preserved for the diary: “Cowboy. Now what
might a cowboy be? Perhaps—” But the viscount perceived that some more
questions were about to be asked; so he worked his way out of the
crowd, released the sleeve, put on the coat and wandered away to seek a
humble and obscure lodging. He found it and went to bed and was soon
asleep.
In the morning, he examined his clothes. They were rather assertive, it
seemed to him, but they were new and clean, at any rate. There was
considerable property in the pockets. Item, five one-hundred dollar
bills. Item, near fifty dollars in small bills and silver. Plug of
tobacco. Hymn-book, which refuses to open; found to contain whiskey.
Memorandum book bearing no name. Scattering entries in it, recording in
a sprawling, ignorant hand, appointments, bets, horse-trades, and so
on, with people of strange, hyphenated name—Six-Fingered Jake,
Young-Man-afraid-of-his-Shadow, and the like. No letters, no documents.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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