The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 18, No. 108, October, 1866: A Magazine of Literature, Science, Art, and Politics — John Shaqi
The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 18, No. 108, October, 1866: A Magazine of Literature, Science, Art, and PoliticsVarious
General
The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 18, No. 108, October, 1866: A Magazine of Literature, Science, Art, and Politics
Various
American periodicals
How many were they? More at the North, than in the hot, hurrying South.
As a rule, the Northerner should be twenty-five years old before
assuming to be a man. For my own part, I have always had an unpleasant
consciousness, which I am only now escaping from, of non-precocity,
anti-precocity, in fact, _post_cocity. I have been relatively immature.
In important particulars I have been, somehow, ten years behind
men--boys if you like--of my own age. The particulars I mean are those
of intercourse with other people.
The first ten years of my life seem to me now to have been almost
totally empty. I can conjure up, not without some effort, a scanty
platoon of small, dim images from school and Sunday school and church
and home; but they are few and faint.
I remember a little dirty-faced rampant girl at an infant school in
Pine Street, who was wont to scratch us with such fell and witch-like
malignity and persistence, that the teacher was fain to sew up her small
fists in unbleached cotton bags,--Miss Roquil's school (I never found
out that the name was Rockwell until ten years afterwards,--so phonetic
is nature!) in Parade Street, where the huge, cunning Anakim of the
first class used to cajole me, poor little man, always foolishly
benevolent, into bestowing upon them all the gingerbread of my lunch,
which I gave, and found a dim, vague sense of incorrectness remaining in
my childish mind. They must have been boys of fourteen or fifteen; but I
remember them as of giantly stature and vast age.
A grisly being haunted the neighborhood through which I had afterwards
to pass to another school,--a great, hulking, brutal fellow, Tom
Reddiford by name, from whom I apprehended unimaginable tortures. I
crept back and forth in such dumb, nameless frights as frontier children
may have felt, who, in old times of Indian war, passed through woods
where the red hand of a Wyandot might grasp them out of any bush. I have
not the least idea why this wretched Reddiford used to hunt me so, as
when one doth hunt a partridge in the mountains, unless out of pure
beastly enjoyment of my childish frights. He did, once or twice, hustle
me about, I believe, but never inflicted actual bodily harm. I told my
parents; but they helped me not at all. Either they thought I was not
really scared, or that the experience would do me good; but it was a
mistake. My father should have searched out this young bully and
effectually quieted him. Fright is a most beneficial thing for bullies,
but a sadly harmful one for a little boy. How fervently I vowed to
"lick" that Tom Reddiford, if I ever grew half as big as he! Very likely
he has died in a brawl or a poor-house by this time. But his outrages
burnt into my mind scars so deep that they are part of its structure. I
will pay him off yet, if I meet him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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