The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored ManJohnson, James Weldon
General
The Autobiography of an Ex-Colored Man
Johnson, James Weldon
African American men -- Fiction; Racially mixed people -- Fiction
After thinking for a while as best I could, I wisely decided to go at
once back to the University and lay my troubles before the president.
I rushed breathlessly back to the school. As I neared the grounds, the
thought came across me, would not my story sound fishy? Would it not
place me in the position of an impostor or beggar? What right had I to
worry these busy people with the results of my carelessness? If the
money could not be recovered, and I doubted that it could, what good
would it do to tell them about it? The shame and embarrassment which
the whole situation gave me caused me to stop at the gate. I paused,
undecided, for a moment; then, turned and slowly retraced my steps,
and so changed the whole course of my life.
If the reader has never been in a strange city without money or
friends, it is useless to try to describe what my feelings were; he
could not understand. If he has been, it is equally useless, for he
understands more than words could convey. When I reached my lodgings,
I found in the room one of the porters who had slept there the night
before. When he heard what misfortune had befallen me, he offered many
words of sympathy and advice. He asked me how much money I had left. I
told him that I had ten or twelve dollars in my pocket. He said: "That
won't last you very long here, and you will hardly be able to find
anything to do in Atlanta. I'll tell you what you do, go down to
Jacksonville and you won't have any trouble to get a job in one of the
big hotels there, or in St. Augustine." I thanked him, but intimated
my doubts of being able to get to Jacksonville on the money I had. He
reassured me by saying: "Oh, that's all right. You express your trunk
on through, and I'll take you down in my closet." I thanked him again,
not knowing then what it was to travel in a Pullman porter's closet.
He put me under a deeper debt of gratitude by lending me fifteen
dollars, which he said I could pay back after I had secured work. His
generosity brought tears to my eyes, and I concluded that, after all,
there were some kind hearts in the world.
I now forgot my troubles in the hurry and excitement of getting my
trunk off in time to catch the train, which went out at seven o'clock.
I even forgot that I hadn't eaten anything since morning. We got a
wagon--the porter went with me--and took my trunk to the express
office. My new friend then told me to come to the station at about a
quarter of seven and walk straight to the car where I should see him
standing, and not to lose my nerve. I found my role not so difficult
to play as I thought it would be, because the train did not leave from
the central station, but from a smaller one, where there were no gates
and guards to pass. I followed directions, and the porter took me on
his car and locked me in his closet. In a few minutes the train pulled
out for Jacksonville.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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