No doubt, he would never hear from Anne again. She was alive, she could
live far from him and still overpower him with that abnormal, cruel
uncertainty, with which he struggled as with a nightmare. But why was
Elizabeth also so silent? She had contributed to this flight, she who
had not been willing to leave them to their passion, but had taken time
and memories for her allies. Knowing him to be free, she had come at a
most untimely occasion to remind him of his duty. If he had refused to
accompany her, was that a reason for him to give up their children
again? He had the right to be told of their health, of their education,
of their holidays. In spite of himself, in this scorching, deserted
Paris, his thoughts turned to Elizabeth, and he became set on demanding
his rights, and reached the conclusion that he must not allow them to be
disregarded. Nothing now prevented his claiming his children for several
months of the year. He would go to Grenoble, and even to Saint Martin to
find them. In this way he would be able to see Elizabeth, whom he still
thought only of harassing. But to annoy her was precisely the only way
of seeing her again, of seeing once more her touching eyes, her
frightened face, her tense body, fragile and thin, when he had known her
to be only indifferent and unresponsive. In certain more lucid hours, he
reproached himself for his concern about her, as for a new impossible
infidelity. But why did she not write? Had she then tired of her rôle
of faithfulness?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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