“And we’ll pretend you swept a chimney at a very grand house and made rather a mess.” Then I went on in the awful voice, “You scamp, I’ll thrash you within two inches of your life.” “With a rope end?” Teddy said. He began to look quite happy. “I saw a piece in the stable-yard yesterday, Molly,” he went on, sort of coaxingly. “Shall I go out and get it to knock you with?” I asked him. “Oh, Molly!”--he put both his arms round my neck and gave a little shriek for happiness--“Oh, Molly, I do love you!” V THE RAGE OF THE HEATHEN I advise you not ever to be a missionary. I don’t mean the proper sort that get eaten up by savages and cassowaries, because you can’t do that until you’re grown up; but don’t try and be a missionarying child at home. If you do, the most disagreeable things will happen, though perhaps that part wouldn’t have been so bad if Mother had been there. It was in November, very soon after Mother had gone away, that Humphrey and I went to the children’s service. I know it was then because the day before had been Guy Fawkes day, and so everything seemed dull and horrid, like it does when there’s just been something very nice, and that was why we went. Jane took us--she’s the housemaid and very fond of things like that, not only reading the Bible, which any one would enjoy, but she loves the most difficult books of sermons and prayers, and she doesn’t even think the litany a little bit too long. I don’t mean that it was Jane that made us think about being missionaries; it was the clergyman himself. He was a stranger, and his sermon wasn’t a bit like other sermons; it was most interesting, and it was all about setting a good example and being an influence unto righteousness in the lives of little brothers and sisters and lots of things like that. I began to think he must know I was the eldest. Well, I listened to every word he said, I truthfully did, and all the way coming home I talked to Humphrey about it, and planned how to be a home missionary. We settled that we must be very kind to the Poor Heathens--those were Violet and Ted--because they didn’t know any better, but that we’d have to be very firm. Of course, it was rather silly for Humph to be talking like that, because he was really a Poor Heathen too, but he didn’t seem to understand that part properly. I didn’t like to explain it to him then either, and that was the first great mistake, because afterwards he used to get awfully sulky and cross about it, which just showed that he really was a heathen like I said. Besides, how could he possibly be anything else? The clergyman had said one mustn’t put off doing good, so I started directly we got home. Fräulein had gone out to see a friend, and we were to have tea alone, which was a good thing, because it made it easier. I went and tidied myself very nicely, and then I came into the schoolroom. I said, “Violet and Ted, have you washed your hands for tea?”