She slipped back into her old niche almost as if she had never left it.
Mrs. Lorimer was ill with grief and overwork. It seemed only natural that
Avery should take up the burden of her care. Even the Vicar could say
nothing against it.
Avery sometimes wondered if Jeanie's death had pierced the armour of his
self-complacence at any point. If it had, it was not perceptible; but she
did fancy now and then that she detected in him a shade more of
consideration for his wife than he had been wont to display. He
condescended to bestow upon her a little more of his kindly patronage,
and he was certainly less severe in his dealings with the children.
Of the blank in Mrs. Lorimer's life only Avery had any conception, for
she shared it with her during every hour of the day. Perhaps her own
burden weighed more heavily upon her than ever before at that time, for
the anxiety she suffered was sometimes more than she could bear. For
Piers had gone from her without a word. Straight from Jeanie's
death-bed he had gone, without a single word of explanation or farewell.
That she had wounded him deeply, albeit inadvertently, on that last day
she knew; but with his arm closely clasping her by Jeanie's bedside she
had dared to hope that he had forgiven the wound. Now she felt that it
was otherwise. He had gone from her in bitterness of soul, and the
barrier between them was such that she could not call him back. More and
more the conviction grew upon her that those moments of tenderness had
been no more than a part of the game he had summoned her to play for
Jeanie's sake. He had called it a hollow bargain. He had declared that
for no other reason would he have proposed it to her. And now that the
farce was over, he had withdrawn from it. He had said that he had not
found it easy. He had called it mere pretence. And now she had begun to
think that he meant their separation to be final. If he had uttered one
word of farewell, if he had but sent her a line later, she knew that she
would have responded in some measure even though the gulf between them
remained unbridged. But his utter silence was unassailable. The
conviction grew upon her that he no longer desired to bridge the gulf.
He meant to accept their estrangement as inevitable. He had left her,
and he did not wish to return.
Through the long weary watches of many nights Avery pondered his
attitude, and sought in vain for any other explanation. She came at
last to believe that the fierce flame of his passion had wholly burnt
itself out, consuming all the love he had ever known; and that only
ashes remained.
So she could not call him back, and for a time she even shrank from
asking news of him. Then one day she met Victor sorrowfully exercising
Caesar along the confines of the Park, and stopped him when with a
melancholy salute he would have passed her by.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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