The Battle of the Books, and other Short PiecesSwift, Jonathan
General
The Battle of the Books, and other Short Pieces
Swift, Jonathan
Ancients and moderns, Quarrel of; English essays; Satire, English
The expression in Apocrypha about Tobit and his dog following him I have
often heard ridiculed, yet Homer has the same words of Telemachus more
than once; and Virgil says something like it of Evander. And I take the
book of Tobit to be partly poetical.
I have known some men possessed of good qualities, which were very
serviceable to others, but useless to themselves; like a sun-dial on the
front of a house, to inform the neighbours and passengers, but not the
owner within.
If a man would register all his opinions upon love, politics, religion,
learning, etc., beginning from his youth and so go on to old age, what a
bundle of inconsistencies and contradictions would appear at last!
What they do in heaven we are ignorant of; what they do not we are told
expressly: that they neither marry, nor are given in marriage.
It is a miserable thing to live in suspense; it is the life of a spider.
The Stoical scheme of supplying our wants by lopping off our desires, is
like cutting off our feet when we want shoes.
Physicians ought not to give their judgment of religion, for the same
reason that butchers are not admitted to be jurors upon life and death.
The reason why so few marriages are happy, is, because young ladies spend
their time in making nets, not in making cages.
If a man will observe as he walks the streets, I believe he will find the
merriest countenances in mourning coaches.
Nothing more unqualifies a man to act with prudence than a misfortune
that is attended with shame and guilt.
The power of fortune is confessed only by the miserable; for the happy
impute all their success to prudence or merit.
Ambition often puts men upon doing the meanest offices; so climbing is
performed in the same posture with creeping.
Censure is the tax a man pays to the public for being eminent.
Although men are accused for not knowing their own weakness, yet perhaps
as few know their own strength. It is, in men as in soils, where
sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not of.
Satire is reckoned the easiest of all wit, but I take it to be otherwise
in very bad times: for it is as hard to satirise well a man of
distinguished vices, as to praise well a man of distinguished virtues. It
is easy enough to do either to people of moderate characters.
Invention is the talent of youth, and judgment of age; so that our
judgment grows harder to please, when we have fewer things to offer it:
this goes through the whole commerce of life. When we are old, our
friends find it difficult to please us, and are less concerned whether we
be pleased or no.
No wise man ever wished to be younger.
An idle reason lessens the weight of the good ones you gave before.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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