To our Sweethearts we said "Knit," We must go and do our Bit! How d'ye do, Pierrot? Pierrette? We are friends of Lafayette! Wait until our Drive begins,-- Bill, you'll suffer for your sins! Sick 'em, Prince! We'll tie the fuse Onto Frederich Wilhelm's shoes. When we occupy Cologne-- Phew! How big and strong you've grown! We will paint each shop and lodge With bright red in camouflage! Then to Carlsbad we will swing; Need the baths like everything! Frauleins leave your fears behind; We don't war on womankind! We are filled with fire and zeal: Watch us pick the locks to Kiel! We are coming to our own In Lorraine across the Rhone! When our Flocks of Eaglets fly-- Dunder! Blitzen! Bill, Good-bye! Beaks of Steel and Claws of Lead-- Sun eclipsed! The Geezer's dead. CHORUS O, you U Boats, That for U! We slipped thru you; How d'y' do? Hindenberg? Ach, let him rant! He won't stop us _'cause he can't_! Zepps and Taubs are falling down; Butcher Bill will lose his crown; Watch your step, you Horrid Hun, You can't _goosestep_ when you _run_! Hooray for the crimson, white and blue! 'Rah for Old Glory! _Chapeau bas vous!_ 'Rah for the Tri-Color! We're at home In _la belle_ France by the _eau de_ Somme; Hooray for our Allies true and brave! We'll all sweep thru like a tidal wave Over the _top_ in a mighty Drive-- And never stop while the HUNDS survive! SIX DAYS O, the comfort we feel When we finish a meal Consisting of rice cakes and whey; Because beyond question There's no indigestion At the end of a Meatless day. When the "buck" dough doth rise From y'East to the skies And hot griddled pancakes--oh, say! With sausages frying There's no use denying Your welcome, O Wheatless day. When the house is afrost Without fuel: its cost Is more than we're able to pay: With our hearts all aglow We can thaw ice or snow Making light of a Heatless day. When there's discord with wife There's a shadow on life That once was so sunny and gay; But billing and cooing Subordinate stewing At the end of a Sweetless day! When will beefsteak and ham Not be sold by the gram? How long will these high prices stay? When the bad Profiteers Show contrition and tears At the dawn of a Cheatless day. When our Soldiers in France Do their Indian dance And scalp all the Huns in the fray, The Kaiser will holler, With rope for a collar, At the end of his Ruthless day! A PROTEST While now 'tis meet to eat fish, eggs and maize, _Vice_ meat and wheat whene'er we dine or sup, So be it! but this protest I would raise-- In spite of warnings--veal keeps bobbing up! A PRAYER