“Rev. Leonidas W. H’m, Reverend Le—well, there was a feller here
once by the name of _Jim_ Smiley, in the winter of ’49—or may be it
was the spring of ’50—I don’t recollect exactly, somehow, though
what makes me think it was one or the other is because I remember
the big flume warn’t finished when he first came to the camp; but
any way, he was the curiousest man about always betting on anything
that turned up you ever see, if he could get anybody to bet on the
other side; and if he couldn’t he’d change sides. Any way that
suited the other man would suit _him_—any way just so’s he got a
bet, _he_ was satisfied. But still he was lucky, uncommon lucky;
he most always come out winner. He was always ready and laying for
a chance; there couldn’t be no solit’ry thing mentioned but that
feller’d offer to bet on it, and take any side you please, as I
was just telling you. If there was a horse-race, you’d find him
flush or you’d find him busted at the end of it; if there was a
dog-fight, he’d bet on it; if there was a cat-fight, he’d bet on
it; if there was a chicken-fight, he’d bet on it; why, if there was
two birds setting on a fence, he would bet you which one would fly
first; or if there was a camp-meeting, he would be there reg’lar
to bet on Parson Walker, which he judged to be the best exhorter
about here, and he was, too, and a good man. If he even see a
straddle-bug start to go anywheres, he would bet you how long it
would take him to get to—to wherever he _was_ going to, and if you
took him up, he would foller that straddle-bug to Mexico but what
he would find out where he was bound for and how long he was on
the road. Lots of the boys here has seen that Smiley and can tell
you about him. Why, it never made no difference to _him_—he’d bet
on _any_ thing—the dangest feller. Parson Walker’s wife laid very
sick once, for a good while, and it seemed as if they warn’t going
to save her; but one morning he come in, and Smiley up and asked
him how she was, and he said she was considerable better—thank the
Lord for his inf’nit’ mercy—and coming on so smart that with the
blessing of Prov’dence she’d get well yet; and Smiley, before he
thought, says, ‘Well, I’ll risk two-and-a-half she don’t anyway.’”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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