Our friend, however, was not a little perplexed to find his
property. Everything on the map was as fair and even as possible,
while all the grounds about him were as undulated as they could
well be imagined, and there was an elbow of the East River
thrusting itself quite into the ribs of the land, which seemed to
have no business there. This puzzled the Frenchman exceedingly;
and, being a stranger in those parts, he called to a farmer in an
adjacent field.
“_Mon ami_, are you acquaint vid dis part of de country—eh?”
“Yes, I was born here, and know every inch of it.”
“Ah, _c’est bien_, dat vill do,” and the Frenchman got out of the
gig, tied the horse, and produced his lithographic map.
“Den maybe you vill have de kindness to show me de sixty lot vich I
have bought, vid de valuarble vatare privalege?”
The farmer glanced his eye over the paper.
“Yes, sir, with pleasure; if you will be good enough to _get into
my boat, I will row you out to them_!”
“Vat dat you say, sure?”
“My friend,” said the farmer, “this section of Long Island has
recently been bought up by the speculators of New York, and laid
out for a great city; but the principal street is only visible _at
low tide_. When this part of the East River is filled up, it will
be just there. Your lots, as you will perceive, are beyond it; _and
are now all under water_.”
At first the Frenchman was incredulous. He could not believe
his senses. As the facts, however, gradually broke upon him, he
shut one eye, squinted obliquely at the heavens—-the river—the
farmer—and then he turned away and squinted at them all over again!
There was his purchase sure enough; but then it could not be
perceived for there was a river flowing over it! He drew a box from
his waistcoat pocket, opened it, with an emphatic knock upon the
lid, took a pinch of snuff and restored it to his waistcoat pocket
as before. Poopoo was evidently in trouble, having “thoughts which
often lie too deep for tears”; and, as his grief was also too big
for words, he untied his horse, jumped into his gig, and returned
to the auctioneer in hot haste.
It was near night when he arrived at the auction-room—his horse in
a foam and himself in a fury. The auctioneer was leaning back in
his chair, with his legs stuck out of a low window, quietly smoking
a cigar after the labors of the day, and humming the music from the
last new opera.
“Monsieur, I have much plaisir to fin’ you, _chez vous_, at home.”
“Ah, Poopoo! glad to see you. Take a seat, old boy.”
“But I shall not take de seat, sare.”
“No—why, what’s the matter?”
“Oh, _beaucoup_ de matter. I have been to see de gran lot vot you
sell me to-day.”
“Well, sir, I hope you like your purchase?”
“No, monsieur, I no like him.”
“I’m sorry for it; but there is no ground for your complaint.”
“No, sare; dare is no _ground_ at all—de ground is all vatare!”
“You joke!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account