It may be imagined how deeply this disturbed me, especially as I felt
that I was myself to blame. I had noticed that Wilbraham was ill when I
had seen him in London, and I should either have persuaded him to come
with me to Glebeshire or stayed with him in London. I was just about to
pack up and go to town when I received a letter from a doctor in a
nursing home in South Audley street saying that a certain Major
Wilbraham was in the home dying and asking persistently for myself. I
took a motor to Drymouth and was in London by five o'clock.
I found the South Audley Street nursing home and was at once surrounded
with the hush, the shaded rooms, the scents of medicine and flowers,
and some undefinable cleanliness that belongs to those places.
I waited in a little room, the walls decorated with sporting prints,
the green baize table gloomily laden with volumes of Punch and the
Tatler. Wilbraham's doctor came in to see me, a dapper, smart little
man, efficient and impersonal. He told me that Wilbraham had at most
only twenty-four hours to live, that his brain was quite clear, and
that he was suffering very little pain, that he had been brutally
kicked in the stomach by some man in the Covent Garden crowd and had
there received the internal injuries from which he was now dying.
"His brain is quite clear," the doctor said. "Let him talk. It can do
him no harm. Nothing can save him. His head is full of queer fancies;
he wants every one to listen to him. He's worrying because there's some
message he wants to send... he wants to give it to you."
When I saw Wilbraham he was so little changed that I felt no shock.
Indeed, the most striking change in him was the almost exultant
happiness in his voice and eyes.
It is true that after talking to him a little I knew that he was dying.
He had that strange peace and tranquillity of mind that one saw so
often with dying men in the war.
I will try to give an exact account of Wilbraham's narrative; nothing
else is of importance in this little story but that narrative; I can
make no comment. I have no wish to do so. I only want to pass it on as
he begged me to do.
"If you don't believe me," he said, "give other people the chance of
doing so. I know that I am dying. I want as many men and women to have
a chance of judging this as is humanly possible. I swear to you that I
am telling the truth and the exact truth in every detail."
I began my account by saying that I was not convinced. How could I be
convinced?
At the same time I have none of those explanations with which people
are so generously forthcoming on these occasions. I can only say that I
do not think Wilbraham was insane, nor drunk, nor asleep. Nor do I
believe that some one played a practical joke....
Whether Wilbraham was insane between the hours when his visitor left
him and his entrance into the nursing home I must leave to my readers.
I myself think he was not.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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