The next morning a poem appeared in the Lawrence paper. The writer must have sat up all night to write it. It was entitled “Waiting for Watson,” and as I am very proud of the only poem I ever had written about me, I am going to ask your permission to read it. Please notice the great variety of human feeling the poet put into it. It even suggests missiles, though it flings none. Lawrence, Mass., _Daily American_, Tuesday, May 29, 1877. WAITING FOR WATSON To the great hall we strayed, Fairly our fee we paid, Seven hundred there delayed, But, where was Watson? Was he out on his beer? Walked he off on his ear? Something was wrong, ’tis clear. What was it, Watson? Seven hundred souls were there, Waiting with stony stare, In that expectant air— Waiting for Watson. Oh, how our ears we strained, How our hopes waxed and waned, Patience to dregs we drained, Yes, we did, Watson! Softly the bandmen played, Rumbled the Night Brigade, For this our stamps we paid, Only this, Watson! But, Hope’s by fruitage fed, Promise and Act should wed, Faith without works is dead, Is it not, Watson? Give but one lusty groan, For bread we’ll take a stone, Ring your old telephone! Ring, brother Watson. Doubtless ’tis very fine, When, all along the line, Things work most superfine— Doubtless ’tis Watson. Let’s hear the thrills and thrums, That your skilled digit drums, Striking our tympanums— Music from Watson. We know that, every day, Schemes laid to work and pay, Fail and “gang aft a-gley”— Often, friend Watson. And we’ll not curse, or fling, But, next time, do the thing And we’ll all rise and sing, “Bully for Watson!” Or, by the unseen powers, Hope in our bosom sours, No telephone in ours— “Please, Mr. Watson.” [Illustration: _The First Telephone Advertisement, Used the Year Following the Issuance of the Original Patent, Offered to Furnish Telephones “for the Transmission of Articulate Speech Through Instruments Not More Than Twenty Miles Apart.”_] The Telephone. The proprietors of the Telephone, the invention of Alexander Graham Bell, for which patents have been issued by the United States and Great Britain, are now prepared to furnish Telephones for the transmission of articulate speech through instruments not more than twenty miles apart. Conversation can be easily carried on after slight practice and with the occasional repetition of a word or sentence. On first listening to the Telephone, though the sound is perfectly audible, the articulation seems to be indistinct; but after a few trials the ear becomes accustomed to the peculiar sound and finds little difficulty in understanding the words. The Telephone should be set in a quiet place, where there is no noise which would interrupt ordinary conversation.