The moment was terrible for Abner. He felt his heart leap so wildly that
he knew she must be conscious of its thudding. The movement of her body,
shaken with sobs, against his own, filled him not with pity but with
exultation. There was no woman like her in the world. He knew it.
Hadn’t he known it long enough? If he told himself the truth he must
admit that for months he had never wanted any other woman. The desires
that had hungered him the night before, walking beneath her window and in
the moonlit lane, returned to him in waves of greater force. He laughed
to think that, being so near to her, he should ever have given a thought
to Susie Hind. Now she was in his arms. His hands caressed her beauty.
How should he touch her body without passion? And why? Surely she could
feel the blood beating in his fingers, even if she told herself that he
was only trying to comfort her. No one could see them there . . . no one
except the two children, crying softly together because they heard their
mother crying. Why shouldn’t he gather her in his arms, overwhelming her
with kisses? He could see nothing but her lips. . . .
But when he strained her to him she stopped sobbing and pushed him away.
It was now dark but for the light of the moon hidden above the mist, and
he could only see the paleness of her face. Her ghost spoke to him.
‘I’ve lost my handkerchief,’ she said simply.
He gave her his own, and she thanked him.
‘I don’t know what I’ve been saying,’ she whispered. ‘I think I must
have been mad, Abner. Please forget it.’
He would have helped her to her feet, but her muscles would not respond
to the brain’s message. She gave a weak laugh. Now she did not mind
being weak. She looked at him helplessly.
‘I can’t go another step,’ she said. ‘I’m sorry, but I can’t. Perhaps,
if you left us here, you might find if there’s a house near. I’ll look
after these poor lambs. We can keep warm close together.’
No doubt she spoke wisely. He left them without a word, though Gladys
cried out with alarm to see him going. His shoulders loomed up in the
cloud, and as he skirted the lake the gulls rose screaming from its
surface to be lost in the sky.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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