American fiction -- 20th century; Short stories, American
Equipped as we are for the conquest of comfort with fresh pipes,
full mugs, and the flavor of a best of suppers still extant within our
mouths, it may be an impertinence for one to moralize. And yet, as I go
forward to this incident, I will premise that, in every least exigency
of life, ill begets ill, while good springs from good and follows the
doer with a profit. Such has been my belief; such, indeed, has been my
unbroken experience; and the misfortunes of Connelly, and my relief of
them, small matters in themselves, are in proof of what I say.
At sixty I look back with envy on that decade which followed my issuing
forth from Trinity College, when, hopeless, careless, purposeless beyond
the moment, I wandered the face of the earth and fed or starved at the
hands of chance-born opportunity. I was up or down or rich or poor, and,
with an existence which ran from wine to ditch water and back again
to wine, was happy. I recall how in those days of checkered fortune,
wherein there came a proportion of one hour of shadow to one moment of
sun, I was wont to think on riches and their possession. I would say to
myself: “And should it so befall that I make my millions, I’ll have
none about me but broken folk: I’ll refuse to so much as permit the
acquaintance of a rich man.” I’ve been ever deeply controlled by the
sentiment therein expressed. Sure it is, I’ve been incapable of the
example of the Levite, and could never keep to the other side of the way
when distress appealed.
My youth was wild, and staid folk called it “vicious.” I squandered my
fortune; melted it, as August melteth ice, while still at Trinity. It
was my misfortune to reach my majority before I reached my graduation,
and those two college years which ensued after I might legally write
myself “man” and the wild days that filled them up, brought me to
face the world with no more shillings than might take me to Australia.
However, they were gay though graceless times--those college years; and
Dublin, from Smock Alley to Sackville Street, may still remember them.
Those ten years after quitting Dublin were years of hit or miss. I did
everything but preach or steal. Yes, I even fought three prize-fights;
and there were warped, distorted moments when, bloody but victorious, I
believed it better to be a fighter than to be a bishop.
But for the main, I drifted to the theaters and lived by the drama.
Doubtless I was a wretched actor--albeit I felt myself a Kemble--but the
stage was so far good to me it finally brought me--as an underling of
much inconsequence--to the fair city of New York. I did but little for
the drama, but it did much for me; it led me to America. And now that
I’ve come to New York in this story, I’ve come to Connelly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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