To this cry answers, alas! only too often, the first comer. It is
impossible for certain natures to resist a long time the tortures of
robust and vigorous chastity: the frail human shell would fall to pieces
if it persisted in keeping imprisoned an accumulation of forces, all
gigantic, all fresh, all ready for the battle. The first love is not
slow to appear; and if the neophyte who appears on the horizon lacks
more than two-thirds of the desired virtues, Love is such a magician
that he can create them and transform a worm into a god.
The maiden in her dreams, by looking at the pictures in the church and
within the domestic walls, had fancied a winged man with nothing earthly
and material but two lips to kiss. The object desired by her was an
angel, all love and all ether, who would gather under his large folded
wings the soul of the young girl and carry it away, through the space of
heaven, to a golden region, all light and warmth. The quivering of the
wings and the velvet of a kiss were all the voluptuousness which the
chaste virgin ever thought of dreaming; and beyond it, an obscure and
infinite mystery of which she knew neither name, nor confines, nor form.
And instead of this angel, she beholds a man in trousers, with
mustaches, who smokes much and slanders women; perhaps his hair is
already turning gray, already he may be a husband and a father--but he
is a man.
And the youth, too, had dreamed of his angel. She should have been all
eyes, all locks of hair; divinely slender, with feet which would hardly
touch the earth, eternal smile wreathed in an aureole of light, a soul
ardent as fire and an innocence as pure as the snow that falls upon the
summits of the Jungfrau. And, instead, she who wakes us from the dream
of the night is the provocative, stout maid-servant who by her contours
only, distinct and strong as they are, shows nothing but that she is
much of a woman, and instead of wings she has two sinewy arms and two
hands hardened from the use of pot and broom; and, far from having
winged feet, she pounds the floor with pattens that seem to be soled
with iron--but she is a woman.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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