England -- Social life and customs -- Humor; English wit and humor; Housekeeping -- Humor; Marriage -- Humor
Then some one got up and said there was just one question she would
like to ask, and that was, when Miss Jamieson recommended us to get
those beautifully modelled animals for the nursery--she would ask
presently for the address where they could be got--was there any one
particular animal more than another that she recommended? And was it
better to begin with the tame animals, as being less alarming, and work
gradually up to the jungle animals, or would that be giving the child
a wrong idea of evolution, as, of course, the wild animals did come
first, didn’t they?
Miss Jamieson disposed of this lady by saying that, so long as they
were animals of noble instinct, she did not think it mattered in what
order they came, but she thought that unpleasant animals, such as the
glutton or the sloth, should be kept for more advanced study.
Other inquiries, such as whether a Noah’s Ark were bad in case it
biased the mind towards the dogmatic side of religion, instead of
dwelling on the larger and more comprehensive issues, and whether
playing at soldiers ever resulted in the child becoming brutalised,
were dealt with in their turn, and then a vote of thanks to Miss
Jamieson was proposed, seconded, and carried, and we had tea.
On the way home I passed a house where a young friend of mine lives
with his barbarous parents. I felt it my duty to ask how his father
was.
“We ain’t seen ’im for three days,” said Jimmy. “He’s been on the drunk
and pawned everything in the ’ouse--’e’s a fat-’ead, ’e is.”
I thought, as I walked home, that Mrs. Flockson perhaps exaggerated the
difficulty that parents may have in preserving all that is sweet and
gracious without imposing their own individuality too much upon their
children.
_CHAPTER XXIII_: FOREIGN TRAVEL
A superfluity of efficient females and inefficient Mrs. Muffs, combined
with the slow poison of County Society, may disagree with anyone in
time. I explained this to our country doctor, who is of a different
variety to Dr. Smithson. He wants everything boiled, and is a great
believer in the emotions.
Anyhow, we went abroad just to be out of the way of the fish, and the
best people, and all the other things that annoyed me.
Packing up was a nightmare. I used to let Louise pack for me, but
then I arrived at the end of my journey with a complete outfit of
clothes none of which I wanted; besides such trifling mistakes as three
combs--just because they happened to be on the dressing-table--and no
Aspirin nor water-softener.
No one can pack for another without asking questions; neither can
those who have not Mrs. Simpson’s strong head remember what they want
to take so long as they are being asked. When I was thinking whether
I could get my gloves cleaned by sending them in at once, and whether
I had better take them myself or let Pierce leave them with a message
when he called for the fish, Louise would say: “You will take your grey
whipcord coat, I suppose.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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