Now that September has come, and all our Parliamentary duties are over,
perhaps no class of Snobs are in such high feather as the Continental
Snobs. I watch these daily as they commence their migrations from the
beach at Folkestone. I see shoals of them depart (not perhaps without
an innate longing too to quit the Island along with those happy Snobs).
Farewell, dear friends, I say: you little know that the individual
who regards you from the beach is your friend and historiographer and
brother.
I went to-day to see our excellent friend Snooks, on board the 'Queen of
the French;' many scores of Snobs were there, on the deck of that fine
ship, marching forth in their pride and bravery. They will be at Ostend
in four hours; they will inundate the Continent next week; they will
carry into far lands the famous image of the British Snob. I shall
not see them--but am with them in spirit: and indeed there is hardly a
country in the known and civilized world in which these eyes have not
beheld them.
I have seen Snobs, in pink coats and hunting-boots, scouring over the
Campagna of Rome; and have heard their oaths and their well-known slang
in the galleries of the Vatican, and under the shadowy arches of
the Colosseum. I have met a Snob on a dromedary in the desert, and
picnicking under the Pyramid of Cheops. I like to think how many gallant
British Snobs there are, at this minute of writing, pushing their
heads out of every window in the courtyard of 'Meurice's' in the Rue
de Rivoli; or roaring out, 'Garsong, du pang,' 'Garsong, du Yang;' or
swaggering down the Toledo at Naples; or even how many will be on the
look-out for Snooks on Ostend Pier,--for Snooks, and the rest of the
Snobs on board the 'Queen of the French.'
Look at the Marquis of Carabas and his two carriages. My Lady
Marchioness comes on board, looks round with that happy air of mingled
terror and impertinence which distinguishes her ladyship, and rushes to
her carriage, for it is impossible that she should mingle with the
other Snobs on deck. There she sits, and will be ill in private. The
strawberry leaves on her chariot-panels are engraved on her ladyship's
heart. If she were going to heaven instead of to Ostend, I rather think
she would expect to have DES PLACES RESERVEES for her, and would send to
order the best rooms. A courier, with his money-bag of office round his
shoulders--a huge scowling footman, whose dark pepper-and-salt livery
glistens with the heraldic insignia of the Carabases--a brazen-looking,
tawdry French FEMME-DE-CHAMBRE (none but a female pen can do justice
to that wonderful tawdry toilette of the lady's-maid EN VOYAGE)--and
a miserable DAME DE COMPAGNIE, are ministering to the wants of her
ladyship and her King Charles's spaniel. They are rushing to and fro
with eau-de-Cologne, pocket-handkerchiefs, which are all fringe and
cipher, and popping mysterious cushions behind and before, and in every
available corner of the carriage.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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