Brothers -- Fiction; Didactic fiction; Fathers and sons -- Fiction; Russia -- Social life and customs -- 1533-1917 -- Fiction
“I’ll tell you. He is a man of weak and timorous character; he has
suffered so much and is very good-natured. I keep wondering why he took
offense so suddenly, for I assure you, up to the last minute, he did
not know that he was going to trample on the notes. And I think now
that there was a great deal to offend him ... and it could not have
been otherwise in his position.... To begin with, he was sore at having
been so glad of the money in my presence and not having concealed it
from me. If he had been pleased, but not so much; if he had not shown
it; if he had begun affecting scruples and difficulties, as other
people do when they take money, he might still endure to take it. But
he was too genuinely delighted, and that was mortifying. Ah, Lise, he
is a good and truthful man—that’s the worst of the whole business. All
the while he talked, his voice was so weak, so broken, he talked so
fast, so fast, he kept laughing such a laugh, or perhaps he was
crying—yes, I am sure he was crying, he was so delighted—and he talked
about his daughters—and about the situation he could get in another
town.... And when he had poured out his heart, he felt ashamed at
having shown me his inmost soul like that. So he began to hate me at
once. He is one of those awfully sensitive poor people. What had made
him feel most ashamed was that he had given in too soon and accepted me
as a friend, you see. At first he almost flew at me and tried to
intimidate me, but as soon as he saw the money he had begun embracing
me; he kept touching me with his hands. This must have been how he came
to feel it all so humiliating, and then I made that blunder, a very
important one. I suddenly said to him that if he had not money enough
to move to another town, we would give it to him, and, indeed, I myself
would give him as much as he wanted out of my own money. That struck
him all at once. Why, he thought, did I put myself forward to help him?
You know, Lise, it’s awfully hard for a man who has been injured, when
other people look at him as though they were his benefactors.... I’ve
heard that; Father Zossima told me so. I don’t know how to put it, but
I have often seen it myself. And I feel like that myself, too. And the
worst of it was that though he did not know, up to the very last
minute, that he would trample on the notes, he had a kind of
presentiment of it, I am sure of that. That’s just what made him so
ecstatic, that he had that presentiment.... And though it’s so
dreadful, it’s all for the best. In fact, I believe nothing better
could have happened.”
“Why, why could nothing better have happened?” cried Lise, looking with
great surprise at Alyosha.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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