Lady Euphemia, I join you in remembering the relationship--and the distance. LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. Oh, I don't mean that, Mr. White. At any rate, we were excellent friends many years ago when our cousin Imogen used to give us tea in her school-room. She will be _too_ rejoiced at your return. BROOKE TWOMBLEY. [At the window.] Hullo, I think pa has come home. VALENTINE WHITE. Good-by, Lady Euphemia. BROOKE TWOMBLEY. I say, Effie, Mr. White won't stay. LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. [Indifferently.] What a pity! BROOKE TWOMBLEY. He has turned against civilization, you know, and has become a sort of pleasant cannibal. LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. A cannibal! That is _too_ interesting. Pray remain, Mr. White. My brother, Lord Drumdurris, is on duty at the Palace to-day and is coming on here. We all knew each other as children. He will be _too_ delighted. VALENTINE WHITE. I recollect Lord Vibart, as he then was, very well. He once burnt me with a red-hot poker. LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. Good-humouredly, I am sure. Perhaps you have not heard that he married Lady Egidia Cardelloe, Lord Struddock's second daughter, about two years ago. If you stay you will meet her also. VALENTINE WHITE. Ah, I am afraid I--I---- LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. You will find her _too_ enchanting. BROOKE TWOMBLEY. No, he won't. She's not tattooed or anything. LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. They have a little son, just five months old, who is _too_ divine. BROOKE TWOMBLEY. Ah, now, if you boiled the baby it might be to Val's taste. LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. As they have been constantly travelling, Egidia is only just presented to-day by my mother. You recollect Lady Drumdurris, my mother? VALENTINE WHITE. Perfectly. BROOKE TWOMBLEY. [Poking VALENTINE in the side.] Old Lady Drum! LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. My mother will be _too_ charmed to meet you again. [PROBYN enters.] PROBYN. [To BROOKE.] Sir Julian is coming into the conservatory, sir. BROOKE TWOMBLEY. Pa! [PROBYN goes out.] LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. Oh, dear Sir Julian! [She runs out.] VALENTINE WHITE. Look sharp, Brooke. Let me out. BROOKE TWOMBLEY. Val, I'll tell you what. Come upstairs and smoke a cigarette in my room, and I'll bring the Mater and Imogen to you on the quiet when the people are gone. VALENTINE WHITE. Why, Brooke, do you think that Aunt Kitty and Imogen want a roving relative on the premises who isn't worth tuppence! BROOKE TWOMBLEY. Bosh! Look out, here's pa! He seems awfully mumpish. Come on. [He takes VALENTINE out. Directly they are gone LADY EUPHEMIA re-enters with SIR JULIAN TWOMBLEY, an aristocratic but rather weak-looking man of about fifty-five, wearing his Ministerial uniform.] LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. Are you pleased to get back, uncle? SIR JULIAN TWOMBLEY. [Emphatically.] Yes. [She places him in the arm-chair. He sinks into it with a sigh.] LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART. How is your neuralgia? SIR JULIAN TWOMBLEY. Intense. It has been so ever since---- LADY EUPHEMIA VIBART.