Germans -- Travel -- England -- Kent -- Fiction; Humorous stories
In June this year there were a few fine days, and we supposed the summer
had really come at last. The effect was to make us feel our flat (which
is really a very nice, well-planned one on the second floor at the
corner overlooking the cemetery, and not at all stuffy) but a dull place
after all, and think with something like longing of the country. It was
the year of the fifth anniversary of our wedding, and having decided to
mark the occasion by a trip abroad in the proper holiday season of
August we could not afford, neither did we desire, to spend money on
trips into the country in June. My wife, therefore, suggested that we
should devote a few afternoons to a series of short excursions within a
radius of, say, from five to ten miles round our town, and visit one
after the other those of our acquaintances who live near enough to
Storchwerder and farm their own estates. “In this way,” said she, “we
shall get much fresh air at little cost.”
After a time I agreed. Not immediately, of course, for a reasonable man
will take care to consider the suggestions made by his wife from every
point of view before consenting to follow them or allowing her to follow
them. Women do not reason: they have instincts; and instincts would land
them in strange places sometimes if it were not that their husbands are
there to illuminate the path for them and behave, if one may so express
it, as a kind of guiding and very clever glow-worm. As for those who
have not succeeded in getting husbands, the flotsam and jetsam, so to
speak, of their sex, all I can say is, God help them.
There was nothing, however, to be advanced against Edelgard’s idea in
this case; on the contrary, there was much to commend it. We should get
fresh air; we should be fed (well fed, and, if we chose, to excess, but
of course we know how to be reasonable); and we should pay nothing. As
Major of the artillery regiment stationed at Storchwerder I am obliged
anyhow to keep a couple of horses (they are fed at the cost of the
regiment), and I also in the natural order of things have one of the men
of my battalion in my flat as servant and coachman, who costs me little
more than his keep and may not give me notice. All, then, that was
wanting was a vehicle, and we could, as Edelgard pointed out, easily
borrow our Colonel’s wagonette for a few afternoons, so there was our
equipage complete, and without spending a penny.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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