We were safe. And we starved there.
"Why didn't you come sooner?" I wonder if they know or guess how I feel.
My questions are not questions, but I have to ask them. He is dead. I
don't mean to reproach them--they look well meaning and kindly--but I
feel as if, somehow, knowing why it happened could make it stop, could
let me turn the clock back and make it happen differently. If I could
have signaled them, so they would have come just a little sooner.
They look at one another, turning their funny-face heads uneasily,
moving back and forth, but no one will answer.
The world is dead.... George is dead, that thin, pathetic creature with
the bones showing through his skin that he was when we sat still at the
last with our hands touching, thinking there were people outside who had
forgotten us, hoping they would remember. We didn't guess that the world
was dead, blanketed in radiating dust outside. Politics had killed it.
These beings around me, they had been watching, seeing what was going to
happen to our world, listening to our radios from their small
settlements on the other planets of the Solar System. They had seen the
doom of war coming. They represented stellar civilizations of great
power and technology, and with populations that would have made ours
seem a small village; they were stronger than we were, and yet they had
done nothing.
"Why didn't you stop us? You could have stopped us."
* * * * *
A rabbity one who is closer than the others backs away, gesturing
politely that he is giving room for someone else to speak, but he looks
guilty and will not look at me with his big round eyes. I still feel
weak and dizzy. It is hard to think, but I feel as if they are hiding a
secret.
A doelike one hesitates and comes closer to my bed. "We discussed it ...
we voted...." It talks through a microphone in its helmet with a soft
lisping accent that I think comes from the shape of its mouth. It has a
muzzle and very soft, dainty, long nibbling lips like a deer that
nibbles on twigs and buds.
"We were afraid," adds one who looks like a bear.
"To us the future was very terrible," says one who looks as if it
might have descended from some sort of large bird like a penguin. "So
much-- Your weapons were very terrible."
Now they all talk at once, crowding about my bed, apologizing. "So much
killing. It hurt to know about. But your people didn't seem to mind."
"We were afraid."
"And in your fiction," the doelike one lisped, "I saw plays from your
amusement machines which said that the discovery of beings in space
would save you from war, not because you would let us bring friendship
and teach peace, but because the human race would unite in _hatred_ of
the outsiders. They would forget their hatred of each other only in a
new and more terrible war with us." Its voice breaks in a squeak and it
turns its face away from me.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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