The Caxtons: A Family Picture — Volume 06Lytton, Edward Bulwer Lytton, Baron
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The Caxtons: A Family Picture — Volume 06
Lytton, Edward Bulwer Lytton, Baron
English fiction -- 19th century; Families -- Fiction
"Don't be over-sanguine," says Uncle Jack, as he locks up the MS. in
two red boxes with a slit in the lids, which belonged to one of the
defunct companies. "Don't be over-sanguine as to the price. These
publishers never venture much on a first experiment. They must be
talked even into looking at the book."
"Oh!" said my father, "if they will publish it at all, and at their own
risk, I should not stand out for any other terms. 'Nothing great,' said
Dryden, 'ever came from a venal pen!'"
"An uncommonly foolish observation of Dryden's," returned Uncle Jack;
"he ought to have known better."
"So he did," said I, "for he used his pen to fill his pockets, poor
man!"
"But the pen was not venal, Master Anachronism," said my father. "A
baker is not to be called venal if he sells his loaves, he is venal if
he sells himself; Dryden only sold his loaves."
"And we must sell yours," said Uncle Jack, emphatically. "A thousand
pounds a volume will be about the mark, eh?"
"A thousand pounds a volume!" cried my father. "Gibbon, I fancy, did
not receive more."
"Very likely; Gibbon had not an Uncle Jack to look after his interests,"
said Mr. Tibbets, laughing, and rubbing those smooth hands of his. "No!
two thousand pounds the two volumes,--a sacrifice, but still I recommend
moderation."
"I should be happy indeed if the book brought in anything," said my
father, evidently fascinated; "for that young gentleman is rather
expensive. And you, my dear Jack,--perhaps half the sum may be of use
to you!"
"To me! my dear brother," cried Uncle Jack "to me! Why when my new
speculation has succeeded, I shall be a millionnaire!"
"Have you a new speculation, uncle?" said I, anxiously. "What is it?"
"Mum!" said my uncle, putting his finger to his lip, and looking all
round the room; "Mum! Mum!"
Pisistratus.--"A Grand National Company for blowing up both Houses of
Parliament!"
Mr. Caxton.---"Upon my life, I hope something newer than that; for they,
to judge by the newspapers, don't want brother Jack's assistance to blow
up each other!"
Uncle Jack (mysteriously).--"Newspapers! you don't often read a
newspaper, Austin Caxton!"
Mr. Caxton.--"Granted, John Tibbets!"
Uncle Jack.--"But if my speculation make you read a newspaper every
day?"
Mr. Caxton (astounded).--"Make me read a newspaper every day!"
Uncle Jack (warming, and expanding his hands to the fire).--"As big as
the 'Times'!"
Mr. Caxton (uneasily).--"Jack, you alarm me!"
Uncle Jack.--"And make you write in it too,--a leader!"
Mr. Caxton, pushing back his chair, seizes the only weapon at his
command, and hurls at Uncle Jack a great sentence of Greek,--
". . . a quotation in Greek . . ." (1)
Uncle Jack (nothing daunted).--"Ay, and put as much Greek as you like
into it!"
Mr. Caxton (relieved and softening). "My dear Jack, you are a great man;
let us hear you!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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