The Caxtons: A Family Picture — Volume 08Lytton, Edward Bulwer Lytton, Baron
General
The Caxtons: A Family Picture — Volume 08
Lytton, Edward Bulwer Lytton, Baron
English fiction -- 19th century; Families -- Fiction
reserve: his frankness was apparent in his talk on all matters
immediately before us, in the utter absence of all effort to make
himself seem better than he was. His reserve was equally shown in the
ingenious evasion of every species of confidence that could admit me
into such secrets of his life as he chose to conceal where he had been
born, reared, and educated; how he came to be thrown on his own
resources; how he had contrived, how he had subsisted, were all matters
on which he had seemed to take an oath to Harpocrates, the god of
silence. And yet he was full of anecdotes of what he had seen, of
strange companions whom he never named, but with whom he had been
thrown. And, to do him justice, I remarked that though his precocious
experience seemed to have been gathered from the holes and corners, the
sewers and drains of life, and though he seemed wholly without dislike
to dishonesty, and to regard virtue or vice with as serene an
indifference as some grand poet who views them both merely as
ministrants to his art, yet he never betrayed any positive breach of
honesty in himself. He could laugh over the story of some ingenious
fraud that he had witnessed, and seem insensible to its turpitude; but
he spoke of it in the tone of an approving witness, not of an actual
accomplice. As we grew more intimate, he felt gradually, however, that
pudor, or instinctive shame, which the contact with minds habituated to
the distinctions between wrong and right unconsciously produces, and
such stories ceased. He never but once mentioned his family, and that
was in the following odd and abrupt manner:--
"Ah!" cried he one day, stopping suddenly before a print-shop, "how that
reminds me of my dear, dear mother."
"Which?" said I, eagerly, puzzled between an engraving of Raffaelle's
"Madonna" and another of "The Brigand's Wife."
Vivian did not satisfy my curiosity, but drew me on in spite of my
reluctance.
"You loved your mother, then?" said I, after a pause. "Yes, as a whelp
may a tigress."
"That's a strange comparison."
"Or a bull-dog may the prize-fighter, his master! Do you like that
better?"
"Not much; is it a comparison your mother would like?"
"Like? She is dead!" said he, rather falteringly.
I pressed his arm closer to mine.
"I understand you," said he, with his cynic, repellent smile. "But you
do wrong to feel for my loss. I feel for it; but no one who cares for
me should sympathize with my grief."
"Why?"
"Because my mother was not what the world would call a good woman. I
did not love her the less for that. And now let us change the subject."
"Nay; since you have said so much, Vivian, let me coax you to say on.
Is not your father living?"
"Is not the Monument standing?"
"I suppose so; what of that?"
"Why, it matters very little to either of us; and my question answers
yours."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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