The Century Illustrated Monthly Magazine, September, 1913: Vol. LXXXVI, No. 5Various
General
The Century Illustrated Monthly Magazine, September, 1913: Vol. LXXXVI, No. 5
Various
Periodicals
The Senior Surgeon’s nostrils were all puckered up with the stench
of burning varnish. The Senior Surgeon’s mind was full of the horrid
thought that he’d forgotten to renew his automobile fire-insurance,
and that he had a sprained back, and that his rival colleague had told
him he didn’t know how to run an auto, anyway, and that the cook had
given notice that morning, and that he had a sprained back, and that
the moths had gnawed the knees out of his new dress-suit, and that the
Superintendent of Nurses had had the audacity to send him a bunch of
pink roses for his birthday, and that the boiler in the kitchen leaked,
and that he had to go to Philadelphia the next day to read a paper on
“Surgical Methods at the Battle of Waterloo” and he hadn’t even begun
the paper yet, and that he had a sprained back, and that the wall-paper
on his library hung in shreds and tatters, waiting for him to decide
between a French fresco effect and an early English paneling, and that
his little daughter was growing up in wanton ugliness under the care of
coarse, indifferent hirelings, and that the laundry robbed him weekly
of at least five socks, and that it would cost him fully seven thousand
dollars to replace this car, and that he had a sprained back.
“It’s restful, isn’t it?” cooed the White Linen Nurse.
“Isn’t _what_ restful?” glowered the Senior Surgeon.
“Sitting down,” said the White Linen Nurse.
Contemptuously the Senior Surgeon’s mind ignored the interruption and
reverted precipitously to its own immediate problem concerning the
gloomy, black-walnut-shadowed entrance-hall of his great house, and
how many yards of imported linoleum at $3.45 a yard it would take
to recarpet the “confounded hole”; and how it would have seemed,
anyway, if--if he hadn’t gone home as usual to the horrid black-walnut
shadows that night, but been carried home instead, feet first and quite
dead--dead, mind you, with a _red_ necktie on, and even the cook was
out! And they wouldn’t even know where to lay him, but might put him by
mistake in that--in that--in his dead wife’s dead bed!
Altogether unconsciously a little fluttering sigh of ineffable
contentment escaped the White Linen Nurse.
“I don’t care how long we have to sit here and wait for help,” she
announced cheerfully, “because to-morrow, of course, I’ll have to get
up and begin all over again--and go to Nova Scotia.”
“Go _where_?” lurched the Senior Surgeon.
“I’d thank you kindly, sir, not to jerk my skirt quite so hard,” said
the White Linen Nurse, just a trifle stiffly.
Incredulously once more the Senior Surgeon withdrew his detaining hand.
“I’m not even touching your skirt,” he denied desperately. Nothing
but denial and reiterated denial seemed to ease his self-esteem for
an instant. “Why, for Heaven’s sake, should I want to hold on to
your skirt?” he demanded peremptorily. “What the deuce,” he began
blusteringly--“why in--”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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