I stood looking at the river for a moment. I don't remember that any
thoughts or emotions came to my mind. I simply stood there, a little
dazed, and very quiet, with a vague picture of Selda before my eyes. It
was a dream-like moment.
Then I slipped over the river's bank, into the water, and the swift
current, catching me up and whirling me around dizzily, carried me
toward the edge of the waterfall.
And So to Work
I glanced at the clock on the mantel. It was five minutes to eight: time
to leave, if I was to get a decent breakfast before I went to the
office. I found an old hat in the closet and put it on. It would do
until I had time to buy another.
Last night--and this morning. Last night, after supper, I had dropped by
the Club for a drink. And met Melbourne. This morning I woke in the
water of the lake, and came home, and dressed. And went to work. Twelve
hours--and in that time I had lived two months. I had fallen in love,
and died. Now I must go to work.
As I left the apartment, and turned west away from the Drive, toward the
street cars, I was whistling over and over a brief snatch of music. Was
it Grieg? Or some composer never heard on earth?
There were people on the street now. They went by with frowning, intent
faces--on their way to work. And cars rolling by, pausing at the cross
streets with little squealings of brakes.
Everything was so simple now. I went over it all as I waited for the
street car, and as I rode down town. It was strange that Melbourne had
never foreseen that one possibility among so many.
We had sat down in our chairs, and then the adventure had begun. I
had felt the sensation of moving about, of going from place to place.
When I was a child I used to have dreams of walking about the
house and about the streets. I would wake up on the stairs, or at the
door--sleep-walking. Reflexes did it. I had left the chair, under the
influence of the story in the Chamber of Life, and gone out of the room.
I remembered now all those brief moments, when I had seemed poised on
the brink of the real world--the stumbling against some hard object, the
face under the street-lamp, the taxi, the voices. I had been going
through the dark streets, with closed eyes, going toward the
Drive--sleep-walking. And when I slipped over the bank of the river, in
the dream, and down into the water--in reality I had gone over the side
of the Drive, and down into the cold lake.
It had been dawn.
* * * * *
I left the car, and walked down the street, lost in the midst of the
crowds hurrying about me. It was all over, gone like one of those old
dreams of my childhood. I could never forget it--never forget Selda--but
it was gone. It had never existed. It had been cruel of Melbourne, cruel
and ironic, to put Selda in the dream. But perhaps he had never realized
that it would last over into reality.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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