“In breeches and gaiters, broad-brimmed hat, gray coat, speckled
choker,” said the waiter.
“No,” I said bashfully, “I haven’t the pleasure----”
“He came in here,” said the waiter, looking at the light through the
tumbler, “ordered a glass of this ale--_would_ order it--I told
him not--drank it, and fell dead. It was too old for him. It oughtn’t
to be drawn; that’s the fact.”
I was very much shocked to hear of this melancholy accident, and said I
thought I had better have some water.
“Why you see,” said the waiter, still looking at the light through the
tumbler, with one of his eyes shut up, “our people don’t like things
being ordered and left. It offends ’em. But _I’ll_ drink it, if
you like. I’m used to it, and use is everything. I don’t think it’ll
hurt me, if I throw my head back, and take it off quick. Shall I?”
I replied that he would much oblige me by drinking it, if he thought he
could do it safely, but by no means otherwise. When he did throw his
head back, and take it off quickly, I had a horrible fear, I confess,
of seeing him meet the fate of the lamented Mr. Topsawyer, and fall
lifeless on the carpet. But it didn’t hurt him. On the contrary, I
thought he seemed the fresher for it.
“What have we got here?” he said, putting a fork into my dish. “Not
chops?”
“Chops,” I said.
“Lord bless my soul!” he exclaimed. “I didn’t know they were chops.
Why, a chop’s the very thing to take off the bad effects of that beer!
Ain’t it lucky?”
So he took a chop by the bone in one hand, and a potato in the other,
and ate away with a very good appetite, to my extreme satisfaction.
He afterwards took another chop, and another potato; and after that
another chop and another potato. When he had done, he brought me a
pudding, and having set it before me, seemed to ruminate, and to become
absent in his mind for some moments.
“How’s the pie?” he said, rousing himself.
“It’s a pudding,” I made answer.
“Pudding!” he exclaimed. “Why, bless me, so it is! What!” looking at it
nearer. “You don’t mean to say it’s a batter-pudding!”
“Yes, it is indeed.”
“Why, a batter-pudding,” he said, taking up a tablespoon, “is my
favorite pudding! Ain’t that lucky? Come on, little ’un, and let’s see
who’ll get most.”
The waiter certainly got most. He entreated me more than once to come
in and win, but what with his tablespoon to my teaspoon, his despatch
to my despatch, and his appetite to my appetite, I was left far behind
at the first mouthful, and had no chance with him. I never saw any one
enjoy a pudding so much, I think; and he laughed, when it was all gone,
as if his enjoyment of it lasted still.
Finding him so very friendly and companionable, it was then that I
asked for the pen and ink and paper to write to Peggotty. He not only
brought it immediately, but was good enough to look over me while I
wrote the letter. When I had finished it, he asked me where I was going
to school.
I said, “Near London,” which was all I knew.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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