grace, and the luxury that surrounded them, concluding usually with a
heavy sigh, as he looked around our miserable room: '_Ils sont passés,
ces jours de fête!_"
"This always affected my mother unpleasantly, and my sisters listened
to these constantly repeated tales without any special pleasure. They
had very little imagination, and were completely absorbed in the petty
cares and joys of the present; but these fairy like descriptions so
filled my mind, that the wretched reality of my life became more and
more distasteful to me. I dreamed of nothing but magnificence and
splendor, a luxurious existence without any cares, and of kings and
princes paying court to me. I gave grand names to my dolls, constantly
practiced speaking French, which my father approved, and when one day
at dinner, the conversation turned upon what each of us wanted to
become. I, precocious little ten-year-older, exclaimed: 'I will be a
duchess!'
"My mother angrily reproved me: 'it was wicked pride, I must try to
become good and pious, modest and industrious'--you can probably
imagine all I heard. My father was perfectly silent. Afterwards when I
was alone with him, he drew me, still violently weeping into his arms,
kissed my wet eyes, and said only: '_Sois tranquille, ma mignonne. Tu
vas gáter tes beaux yeux avec ces larmes._' From that day, at home and
at school, whenever any one wanted to tease me, I was called 'Duchess
Toinette.' But I was not at all annoyed; on the contrary I liked the
nickname far better than the simple 'Toni,' my mother usually called
me. After a time as I became more sensible and perceived that my
father's little pension would not enable us to live in ducal style, I
might have lost this sickly desire for royal luxury, and in time
learned to be satisfied with a modest income, like my sisters. But
unfortunately there was a constant temptation close at hand. For years,
our little city had been under the rule of a petty prince, and the
ancestral castle still stood in all its magnificence on a wooded
height, which could be climbed in ten minutes. The prince himself had
been suddenly killed in the prime of life, while hunting. The solemn
funeral, which all the inhabitants flocked to attend, was the first
memorable spectacle that had left a lasting impression on my childish
brain. Since that time, the princess had lived in the castle with
her children, a pretty little boy some years older than I, and
several daughters. The household was maintained in the same style as
before, and after the year of mourning had expired, new guests and
entertainments brought fresh gayety.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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